A series of essays.....
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| A GRANDDAUGHTER'S PERSPECTIVE AND TALENT ~EASTER GREETINGS TO EVERYONE~ |
......as seen through my eyes!
By: Jacqueline E. Hughes
My Mother called it constructive criticism. It was, apparently, something that I couldn't 'take' to save my life.
But, take it we did, my three brothers and I, and it became a way of life for us. It was always like the swift kick underneath the kitchen table requesting our silence when something might come spilling out of our mouths that Mother believed should not.
As if being criticized weren't bad enough, nobody wants to be judged via disapproval, especially by their own parents. Then, suddenly, like a padded glove worn to soften the blow to their own character and esteem, the word 'constructive' was slammed into the mix and coupled with the word 'criticism.' Instantly, they became two 'verbal' box cars united for the long journey down the tracks to the ancient city of 'Discipline.'
No matter how laudable, hopeful, or for the good the aim might have been, the spirit of our youthful actions had been gravely criticized by the two people we loved the most. To this day, I believe that by telling a teenager, "You can't take constructive criticism," represents a gross misuse of the power behind these two unique and important words. Spoken with a bluster of insensitive sarcasm, the best of intents towards deriving positive results almost turns into a threat instead.
While raising two awesome daughters myself, many important lessons had been learned growing up under my parent's roof. Perhaps the most important one was knowing to bite my tongue before telling my children that they could not handle constructive criticism. We do learn from our parent's examples....one way or another. I will chalk it up to 'tough love' and leave it at that.
The longest way around is the shortest way home....a proverbial saying of the mid 17th century, meaning that not trying to take a short cut is often the most effective way. By taking that first, single step, our longest journey commences; a brand new beginning.
With emphasis on how important a single decision may be, I always think back on how difficult, at least for me, my husband's choice to accept permanent employment in Orlando, Florida, was twenty years ago. No amount of blue skies, swaying palm trees, or the tide's pull of the Atlantic Ocean and the Gulf of Mexico could convince me that leaving Michigan was a good idea. Little did I know, at the time, it was the best decision of our lives.
Escaping the heartache of past economic struggles and reaching out towards the light offered by greater opportunities and prosperity, we were like a young couple once again, albeit in our mid-forties, dancing in the springtime rain with joy in our hearts and hope in our steps. We were happy! We wanted to make one another happy.
The sheer joy of being together, depending on one another, and accomplishing things as a team made us feel alive. Eventually, the gentle sway of the palm trees and the warmth of the sun symbolized that giant first step we both needed in order to understand just what the future had in store for us.
Sure, we played with the possibility of sitting on the porch of a log home in Iron Duff, North Carolina, gently rocking back and forth while sharing tidbits from our day and staring out at an incomparable view of green mountains and gentle valleys. Not a bad way to usher in the golden years. Then, there will always be the desire for, what I believe to be, the benefits of living in France for a period of time. Such beauty and grace set apart from our present society lacking, for the most part, in both.
Ultimately, after twenty years of discovering what mysteries lie within our own hearts, home is calling us back. Unable to resist the siren call of the land, our amazing children and grandchildren, and all of the family we left behind in order to follow a better life, the arrow points north, for better or worse.
The appeal of working together on our 'little yellow cottage' and filling it with good times and our five adorable 'little people' up in Kalamazoo, is pulling at us. Delightfully, by taking that first giant leap, another wonderful journey is about to commence.
The act of terrorism inflicted upon Brussels, Belgium, this week applied another deep notch in the 'tree of life' and is, painfully, questioning our credibility as loving human beings once again.
We can fight it with all the gusto we can muster, but fear keeps rearing its ugly head from around the tree trunk and life, as we once accepted it, has changed. Even though we say it won't take away our freedom and peace, it has; it won't make us think twice before making that next reservation and traveling to lands yet to be discovered, but it will....to a certain degree, anyway. Inevitability is a tough nut to crack.
It sometimes feels like we're playing an elaborate game of Russian roulette where any act, if repeated several times, is likely to have disastrous consequences. Then I ask myself, is this how you want to live out this beautiful, short time we have to enjoy on earth? Of course not, I say, because being truly free is being free from fear itself.
The martyrs that perished or were injured at the airport in Brussels and while riding the Metro beneath her streets....they did not suffer without a purpose. Their lives matter as much as those of Paris or San Bernardino and their ultimate sacrifice will never go unacknowledged or taken for granted. It is precisely because they unintentionally gave up their lives for our freedom, we owe it to them to be grateful and forever conscientious of their gift to us all.
We will keep purchasing our airline tickets (if we can afford to) and utilizing the precious use of the Internet to pick and choose the perfect accommodations for a day, a week, in the future. We will anticipate meeting new people and familiarizing ourselves with their way of life. I will hear new stories, see new sights, and I will continue to write about them for the pleasure (My intent, anyway!) of all to read and enjoy.
And that, my friends, is true freedom!
FEAR IS OVERRATED
Fear is overrated
Akin to stress and woe
With its odd angles and dimensions
It will infuse into your psyche
Injuring the Spirit and the Soul
Stand tall and proud this very day
Employing common sense and love
Defeating all of the hate-mongers
Demigods hell-bent on destruction
Profiting from our pain
We've been there before and we've done that
It's time to change our course
Let peace and tolerance navigate us
Into a mindset far away
From bigotry, death, and war
If some must hate, then let them
Sometimes there is no recourse
But keep them in our hearts and prayers
For, in the end, life's burdens
Will seem lighter upon our shoulders
Now close your eyes and hear the sound
Of peace and calmness gathering
Into your mind, body, and soul
Like liquid love, it flows and ebbs
Within you and without
Relaxing deeply, concentrate on
A world free of fear
Place hate far away from you
And allow the feeling of happiness to
Open up all possibilities
You will see that
Fear is overrated, akin to stress and woe
Focus on the positive; eliminate the negative
Infuse love throughout your being
Allow its power to grow
HAPPY EASTER TO YOU AND YOURS....
Copyright © 2016 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved
