A series of essays.....
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| TWO KIDS LIVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST |
.....as seen through my eyes!
By: Jacqueline E. Hughes
When considering that the life expectancy span
of men and women living in the United States averages out to be seventy-nine
years (A 2012 Study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), you
would think that we would be elated by our progress within the last fifty to
sixty years. And, judging by the statistics generated by Baby Boomer's parents
that had been given an average life expectancy span of only sixty-one years,
it's safe to say we've come a long way, baby!
And, we have.
Research in disease control within the last fifty years
has elevated the quality of life by leaps and bounds. I know that's very simply
stated considering the many set-backs we've experienced, including the HIV/AIDS epidemic beginning
in the early 1980's. And, I haven't even broken down the numbers from above by
race, social status, genetics, and so on.
But, that's not my point. Clearly, there are a multitude
of reasons as to why the human average lifespan is what it is today in 2017.
With a thirty-year rise in life expectancy at birth seen during the past
century, we can assume that the improvements in public health have drastically
reduced early-age mortality, allowing most people in developed nations to reach
old age for the first time in recorded history.
Statistics, according to an analytically trained mind,
can be a beautiful thing. In my world, these individuals are labeled 'Black and
White' without having the capacity to see in multiple tones of gray. I find gray
to be a pleasing, if not comforting, color for those who blend the Arts and
Sciences in the form of Creative Art; artistic participation and expression both
physically and visually.
Leaning towards the statistics stated above, however, with
regard to lifespans and how science has prolonged the length of time we might
walk upon this earth, I will be the first to admit that this picture appears
wrong and convoluted to me, lately.
The simple and often terrifying fact of lives lost due
to various diseases, has been haunting many of us to the point of shock and
genuine depression. What used to be something, perhaps, experienced from afar,
has now gained widespread notoriety as its sinister outcome touches our own
lives and souls at almost every turn.
Even though we are elated when hearing that someone has
beaten their illness and is looking forward to sharing many more years with
their family and friends.... Unfortunately, it can be the many sad outcomes that
affect us deeply and fester within our subconscious like the 'horror movie' we
should not have seen at such an early age. Death, especially when unexpected or
deemed way too early, is haunting and frightening.
We'd like to believe that we will all live out our life
expectancy, whatever that may be at any given time, and enjoy a full and healthy
experience throughout our years while doing so!
Life is a uniquely genuine experience that inevitably
ends in death. As with all humans, we encounter death throughout our lifetime.
It can rear its ugly head in our youth with the crippling loss of a beloved
grandparent. Loss looms large and deeply disconcerting when Bootsie, your soft,
purring friend, never returns to greet you with her sweet, delicate feline kisses
upon your return home after a long day at school. And, the sudden loss of a
young cousin in a car accident casts shadows on your world that never existed
before and, instantly, gives you pause to reflect upon your own future at such an
early age.
What throws my world into a tailspin today is the
bombardment of this sad reality of life as it takes its toll by thrusting itself
into every aspect of my human relationships. Granted, life begets death,
eventually. I know that. But, dammit....I have, absolutely, no control over
it!!
Helpless.....
We are human, after all, and this one act, whether it is
our own life or those of others around us being touched by the shadow of death,
proves that we are all vulnerable right from the exact moment of our birth, even
though it may take a long time for us to fully understand the
process.
I fondly recall the captivating sense of humor of our
next door neighbor who made us laugh and cry out with delight. His bout with
cancer came to an end several weeks ago and has doused the laughter and taken
him away from three beautiful, extremely young granddaughters who will miss the
tickles and giggles he lovingly afforded them.
Our son-in-law recently said his good-byes to his
beautiful Mother after she lost her fight with pancreatic cancer. Sadly, from
the beginning of her battle until the end was less than one year's time. Her
life, although taken abruptly, will always be associated with copious amounts of
vigor, passion, and genuine love for everyone she knew.
I know I always talk about social media and its effects
on a world population that has come to find it difficult to relinquish its use.
Because we have opened up our hearts and minds to the possibility of new
friendships, especially via Facebook, we have encountered yet another means by
which we share life (and death) with those we often have never seen face to
face. Within the past four days, I have offered consolation to a good friend
whose husband passed after his extended journey with cancer. Last Saturday, an
author I have been friends with online for years lost her adult son to this
terrible disease. The world has been deprived of his talent and genuine
possibilities.
Being human means treating these relationships with as
much depth of kindness and understanding as you would with someone you've
personally known for years.
Recently, I had been introduced to a kind, imaginative
and gentle man at my husband's company Christmas party. We spent several pleasant hours discussing his passion in life, hydroponic gardening. My husband had had the
distinct pleasure of working with him for nearly a year before learning Monday
morning he had suffered a heart attack over the weekend and lost his life at the
young age of fifty-nine.
Admittedly, it is most likely that my current age is
increasingly haunting my thoughts of mortality. And, even though I have
surpassed the years my own Mother lived in order to touch the lives of her children in
such a profound manner, each year that I enjoy living beyond my Mother's sixty-two is a generous
gift I will never take for granted.
Life is truly way too short to be believed to be so
simple. At the very moment of our birth, we touch or reach out to so many people
and, whether it is an intentional act or not, we cram as many relationships into
our short time here on earth as possible.
But, if we are lucky and play our cards right, out of
the multiple shades of gray that comprise our short, busy, often complicated
lives, we will be able to simplify our life as we age.
Downsizing our homes and choosing to unclutter the 'stuff' we
have around us, making more time for family and friends, sharing new journeys
with someone you love, these are all positive steps towards simplifying our
lives. And, even if we are fortunate to be able to tack-on several more years to
our 'average life expectancy span,' we must never forget about or take for granted
each and every day of the life we have.
Life is too short to be so simple.....simply because we
are human. Our nature is to complicate everything around us. Until we age gracefully, utilize our common sense, and site sound examples of our own vulnerability, will we be able to steer ourselves in the right direction and onto
the path towards a simpler life.
I firmly believe that when we accomplish simplifying our
lives, our extra ten to fifteen years of life expectancy will be enjoyed to the
fullest, understood in depth, and intensely appreciated no matter what fate
hands out to us along the way.
Copyright © 2017 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved
