A series of essays....
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AS WE AGE, WE SHOULD CONSIDER PARTING WITH ANYTHING THAT DOESN’T SPARK JOY WITHIN US WHEN WE SEE OR TOUCH IT. |
....as seen through my eyes!
A young woman cries tears of guilt and regret in a courtroom telling how she spends restless nights apologizing to a black man she has seen made breathless by a policeman’s knee. She is paying a price for recording the truth. Her personal sacrifice is far beyond her few years on earth. We can’t thank her enough for her courage.
Medical staff and volunteers prepare themselves for another day of serving up syringe-filled hope and encouragement to end a pandemic that has taken so many loved ones from us this past year. What an honor to have received the benefit of their selfless attempt at righting a world that is spinning out of control.
Within an effort to soothe a ravaged soul, limiting the use of social media has become a necessary salve applied as often as possible. The manipulative control of the media is very unnerving. Why should we allow it to control our lives when it should only be serving to inform us of the truth? But, this is another story for another time.
Will we ever be able to presume that life is equitable when applied to ordinary, less than perfect, human behavior?
So, I’m wondering if this is a good time to talk about a concept I’ve been reading about called ‘Swedish death cleaning.’ Please be patient with me because it’s really not as morbid as it sounds.
We may eat more healthily and exercise more frequently than ever before, but we can’t ignore the fact that many of us have logged-in close to seventy years on earth by now and that amount of time comes with lots of baggage, memories, and memorabilia.
Two recent events changed my life forever. In a matter of a few weeks time, we sold our home in Florida and then moved to Michigan. These experiences taught me a lot about myself; opened my eyes to new and potentially emotional possibilities that have reshaped my life in many interesting ways.
Without knowing anything about this existing phenomenon called death cleaning, it seems that Dan and I encouraged it by downsizing from twenty-four hundred square feet of living space to around fifteen hundred with our move. Not only did we have over twenty years of Floridian accumulation of stuff to consider now, but there was plenty of stuff brought down to Orlando in 1998 after raising two children and celebrating twenty-three years of marriage in Michigan!
This is where I have to ask if life is fair; what pulls at the heartstrings more than years and years of memories?
On the practical side, who do you think is going to take care of all your things when you’re no longer here? This is a question proposed by the author, Margareta Magnusson, who wrote about death cleansing several years ago. She realized that with many of us clinging to so many tangible items we treasured along life’s journey, there will be a time when nobody else cares about them. Actually, we may even enjoy our mature lives much better without all of the mess and clutter to deal with.
Since minimalism seems to be the flavor of the day, is this merely a trend or a practical solution to giving us a sense of having more power and control over our lives? Magnusson, born in Sweden, says, “You could look at this type of cleaning as being a dietetic regimen for the home.”
If you happen to have children or other relatives who will be responsible for looking after your estate after you’ve gone, is it fair to them to have to deal with your things? Frankly, I believe that some people just don’t care what happens to their belongings once all is said and done and live happy, fulfilled lives among the treasures they have accumulated for years. That, of course, is their choice to make.
So, even after knowing that our life in Orlando was coming to an end, we failed to weed-out, sell, or give away so many small treasures and proceeded to pack them all up for the trip up north. It’s so easy to hide or spread things out in a larger home and quite terrifying to try and fit them into a small, yellow cottage in Kalamazoo. Trust me—we know firsthand!
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JOY IS EMPTYING TWO LARGE STORAGE UNITS, SAVING MONEY, AND FINDING A HOME FOR ALL OF OUR UNNECESSARY THINGS. |
Two years after our move we’ve emptied two ten-by-ten storage units that had been filled with items that did not fit into our new house or lifestyle. By purging and rearranging our things we’ve been called to live with a much lighter footprint on the planet while being happy, dealing with less stress, and being able to talk about death without the strain of divesting a majority of our possessions.
Magnusson claims that, “The argument for doing something like death cleaning is that it makes you more nimble for all of the changes in your life.” I have come to realize how true this concept has become in my own life and encourage others, at any age, to try something different, create good habits, and feel in control of your own destiny.
The young lady who recorded George Floyd’s death on her cell phone will always feel that she could have done more to assist in saving his life. She will have to come to terms with the fact that what she did do was important in its own right. She took control of her life by possessing the tenacity to keep the video running over nine minutes in order to capture the faces of hatred and bigotry.
The officer’s face should have represented the kindness within, especially while holding a position designed to protect and help everyone feel safe and secure. Instead, it showed how superior he felt his race was over a person of color as he proceeded to take that life away from us as easily as stamping out a lit cigarette tossed aside on the dirty, concrete road.
If you don’t see this skewed vision of life as a problem, it may be time to do a bit of thorough death cleaning. It may be time to decide what truly matters in your life and be prepared to throw-out the archaic representations of what others think serves and benefits the majority of us.
Are you up for it?
It’s laborious to make good changes happen. It’s physical and cognitive work. It’s emotional work. But, as we must talk about the inevitability of our death, we must see our way to finding happiness and identifying the pleasure of positive change in our lives through hope, diversity, and love.
Copyright © 2021 by Jacqueline E Hughes
All rights reserved
