HMM....THE POSSIBILITIES OF HOPE!

 A series of essays.....

 ~ HOPE, DREAMS AND INFINITE POSSIBILITIES!~

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

After living on God's wondrous Earth for several years, you occasionally find yourself attempting to explain the phenomenon of life to those you meet along its uneven, cobblestone pathway. Sometimes you feel quite comfortable because your audience is interested in your apparent 'words of wisdom.' For example, your grandchildren. There are times when your listeners are tough customers and wish to ignore the layers of experience and the excellent examples you have to offer. Your own children, perhaps? Then, there's always going to be that one student in life whom you'll find difficult to teach, challenging to understand, and often makes you question your trust in them. That person is....yourself.

As a woman, I sometimes question how I survived high school in the sixties, attended college, became a wife and mother, enjoyed close friendships along the way, and still made time to plan and dream? The answer is, hope. My conclusion is that we're nothing without it, even though some of us may think we've lost it along the way, somewhere deep between the dusty cobblestones, it's there. We just have to look for it.

Hope. It is a very hushed sounding 'four letter word' with an archaic ring to it, used to impart an old fashioned flavor of a much earlier, now distant, time in our life. 

On the contrary, dear friends. Every day of our life we utilize our options of hope in ways we don't even consider significant as in the thought that the traditional male role of breadwinner is no longer relevant within today's social norms. Our hopes and dreams may fluctuate with our current age and lifestyle to a certain degree, however, they should always remain very much alive and well. 

You see, if we lose all hope, if we deny the fact that we continue to dream, if we misplace the longing or desire for something accompanied by the belief in the possibility of its occurrence, we become lost souls. I know we continue to hope right up until the moment we pass from this world and into the next as I recall my father's smiling face upon seeing his four children together, by his hospital bedside, after so many years of separation. I believe his last desire, his final hope, was to see our faces, side by side, once again. He passed away a few short hours later.

~TOTALITY~

Hope came rushing out from the television screen like a colorful waterfall during a spring thaw as thousands of people observed 'totality' during the eclipse this past Monday. It was a spiritual experience that many found difficult to deny. Loved ones were held tightly and the expression of awe on people's faces was followed by tears of joy and delight as they were, collectively, exposed to the miracle of the universe we inhabit. My hope was that we were all capable of pocketing this marvel of the cosmos for future reference and continue on a daily basis to learn important lessons from the experience. Only time will tell.

Yet, even with the strength of knowledge, amazing life experiences, and pledges to see the value of our hopes and dreams take us far into the future, we, as students of life, can fail to see how relevant we are as individuals within the grand scheme of things. As I said before, there's always going to be that one student whom you'll always find difficult to teach. The reality is that if we don't believe in ourselves, life can become futile. Even when others see our potential, we may not accept this truth and become lost for a very long time. 

Am I good enough, strong enough, smart enough to compete in this world for everything I want to achieve? Well, that novel won't be published until it is completed. Those extra pounds won't disappear all by themselves. And, you'll never work at the job of your dreams if you can't figure out what it takes to get there. Even tiny miracles need a strong push in the right direction every now and then! 

One thing we can and should always understand and teach ourselves is how important it is to help each other; be there for one another, whether it's to help feed the underprivileged or hold a hand during a time of crisis. You will never know if or when the tables are turned and you may need to feel the solidness of a good friend or even a stranger in your own life. There is no room in this world for pure selfishness, the denial of basic human rights, or the contention that some of us are even, remotely, superior to others. 

As time continues to layer my world with plans for retirement, dreams of making the world a better place in which to live and love, and ideas for opening up new opportunities and possibilities to ponder along the way.....I cling to hope as my lesson well learned. 

NEVER GIVE UP;
NEVER GIVE IN......!

Hope is fragile. Hope can be very personal. There is always Hope! It can help bring communities and even great nations together once again. This is, precisely, my hope as I write this today. And, as my mid-life dream involves a good, healthy life for my husband and me, my children and their children, my compassion for others and satisfaction for a life well lived revolves around the Hope of even Greater Things to come, as individuals and as a nation. Fingers crossed!

Copyright © 2017 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

LIFE IS WAY TOO SHORT TO BE SO SIMPLE

 A series of essays.....

TWO KIDS LIVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

When considering that the life expectancy span of men and women living in the United States averages out to be seventy-nine years (A 2012 Study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), you would think that we would be elated by our progress within the last fifty to sixty years. And, judging by the statistics generated by Baby Boomer's parents that had been given an average life expectancy span of only sixty-one years, it's safe to say we've come a long way, baby!

And, we have.

Research in disease control within the last fifty years has elevated the quality of life by leaps and bounds. I know that's very simply stated considering the many set-backs we've experienced, including the HIV/AIDS epidemic beginning in the early 1980's. And, I haven't even broken down the numbers from above by race, social status, genetics, and so on.

But, that's not my point. Clearly, there are a multitude of reasons as to why the human average lifespan is what it is today in 2017. With a thirty-year rise in life expectancy at birth seen during the past century, we can assume that the improvements in public health have drastically reduced early-age mortality, allowing most people in developed nations to reach old age for the first time in recorded history.

Statistics, according to an analytically trained mind, can be a beautiful thing. In my world, these individuals are labeled 'Black and White' without having the capacity to see in multiple tones of gray. I find gray to be a pleasing, if not comforting, color for those who blend the Arts and Sciences in the form of Creative Art; artistic participation and expression both physically and visually. 

Leaning towards the statistics stated above, however, with regard to lifespans and how science has prolonged the length of time we might walk upon this earth, I will be the first to admit that this picture appears wrong and convoluted to me, lately. 

The simple and often terrifying fact of lives lost due to various diseases, has been haunting many of us to the point of shock and genuine depression. What used to be something, perhaps, experienced from afar, has now gained widespread notoriety as its sinister outcome touches our own lives and souls at almost every turn. 

Even though we are elated when hearing that someone has beaten their illness and is looking forward to sharing many more years with their family and friends.... Unfortunately, it can be the many sad outcomes that affect us deeply and fester within our subconscious like the 'horror movie' we should not have seen at such an early age. Death, especially when unexpected or deemed way too early, is haunting and frightening. 

We'd like to believe that we will all live out our life expectancy, whatever that may be at any given time, and enjoy a full and healthy experience throughout our years while doing so!

Life is a uniquely genuine experience that inevitably ends in death. As with all humans, we encounter death throughout our lifetime. It can rear its ugly head in our youth with the crippling loss of a beloved grandparent. Loss looms large and deeply disconcerting when Bootsie, your soft, purring friend, never returns to greet you with her sweet, delicate feline kisses upon your return home after a long day at school. And, the sudden loss of a young cousin in a car accident casts shadows on your world that never existed before and, instantly, gives you pause to reflect upon your own future at such an early age.

What throws my world into a tailspin today is the bombardment of this sad reality of life as it takes its toll by thrusting itself into every aspect of my human relationships. Granted, life begets death, eventually. I know that. But, dammit....I have, absolutely, no control over it!! 

Helpless.....

We are human, after all, and this one act, whether it is our own life or those of others around us being touched by the shadow of death, proves that we are all vulnerable right from the exact moment of our birth, even though it may take a long time for us to fully understand the process.

I fondly recall the captivating sense of humor of our next door neighbor who made us laugh and cry out with delight. His bout with cancer came to an end several weeks ago and has doused  the laughter and taken him away from three beautiful, extremely young granddaughters who will miss the tickles and giggles he lovingly afforded them.

Our son-in-law recently said his good-byes to his beautiful Mother after she lost her fight with pancreatic cancer. Sadly, from the beginning of her battle until the end was less than one year's time. Her life, although taken abruptly, will always be associated with copious amounts of vigor, passion, and genuine love for everyone she knew.

I know I always talk about social media and its effects on a world population that has come to find it difficult to relinquish its use. Because we have opened up our hearts and minds to the possibility of new friendships, especially via Facebook, we have encountered yet another means by which we share life (and death) with those we often have never seen face to face. Within the past four days, I have offered consolation to a good friend whose husband passed after his extended journey with cancer. Last Saturday, an author I have been friends with online for years lost her adult son to this terrible disease. The world has been deprived of his talent and genuine possibilities.

Being human means treating these relationships with as much depth of kindness and understanding as you would with someone you've personally known for years.

Recently, I had been introduced to a kind, imaginative and gentle man at my husband's company Christmas party. We spent several pleasant hours discussing his passion in life, hydroponic gardening. My husband had had the distinct pleasure of working with him for nearly a year before learning Monday morning he had suffered a heart attack over the weekend and lost his life at the young age of fifty-nine. 

Admittedly, it is most likely that my current age is increasingly haunting my thoughts of mortality. And, even though I have surpassed the years my own Mother lived in order to touch the lives of her children in such a profound manner, each year that I enjoy living beyond my Mother's sixty-two is a generous gift I will never take for granted.

Life is truly way too short to be believed to be so simple. At the very moment of our birth, we touch or reach out to so many people and, whether it is an intentional act or not, we cram as many relationships into our short time here on earth as possible. 

But, if we are lucky and play our cards right, out of the multiple shades of gray that comprise our short, busy, often complicated lives, we will be able to simplify our life as we age. 

Downsizing our homes and choosing to unclutter the 'stuff' we have around us, making more time for family and friends, sharing new journeys with someone you love, these are all positive steps towards simplifying our lives. And, even if we are fortunate to be able to tack-on several more years to our 'average life expectancy span,' we must never forget about or take for granted each and every day of the life we have.

Life is too short to be so simple.....simply because we are human. Our nature is to complicate everything around us. Until we age gracefully, utilize our common sense, and site sound examples of our own vulnerability, will we be able to steer ourselves in the right direction and onto the path towards a simpler life.

I firmly believe that when we accomplish simplifying our lives, our extra ten to fifteen years of life expectancy will be enjoyed to the fullest, understood in depth, and intensely appreciated no matter what fate hands out to us along the way. 

Copyright © 2017 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

THE TASK OF MAKING AMERICA SMART AGAIN.....?

A series of essays.....

.....as seen through my eyes!




By: Jacqueline E. Hughes
 

To make America smart again, you would have to assume that it was smart to begin with.

And, it was....before Washington D.C. became 'the swamp' following the November 8 election, it was known as a fair and balanced ecosystem that incorporated all people, faiths, and ideologies within its borders. It was quickly drained of its kindness and left vulnerable and open to greed, fear, and foreign influence!

As a young child living with my parents, older brother and, eventually, my two younger brothers, I was young, naive, and authority figures surrounded my everyday life. They wore grown-up clothes which included suits and ties, long black 'habits' that covered everything with the exception of their face and hands, and high-necked dresses adorned with silver chains from which a studious-looking pair of eyeglasses dangled from, often resembling an awkward piece of sculpture resting on their bosom. Authoritarianism.

This doesn't include the male authority figure who would preside at daily mass and then hide in a small cupboard as he listened to our sins, offered the forgiveness of God, and then sent us out of the cupboard to pray for that forgiveness. I can recall being on the playground when this holy man would stride through us kids on his way from the Rectory to the school building. We would all silently pray that he could not recognize our voices, connect them with our faces, and know what we individually confessed to him during the week! Humbleness.

Our respect for policemen went without saying. They were there to protect us from evil. Although, at such a young age, I really didn't know what that evil consisted of. Those were the days, as well, when the family doctor came calling at our house to check my throat and take my temperature before telling my parents that I had strep throat.....again, and would have to bed rest and take his prescribed medication. Consolation.

Growing older, my world greatly expanded and my own thoughts, lifestyle, and habits began to mold and shape my individualism and formulate my ideas as an adolescent and young adult. Maturity.

Fear was an obsolete term for me as I approached adulthood. I may have only applied it to the fact that I feared losing my parents one day....the only authority figures who, whether out of love or heavy doses of pure guilt, would always have the power to affect my life like no one else could. Loyalty.

I am, significantly, older now. I have lived through so much while making many decisions along with minor/major life changes. I have become book-smart, responsible, commonsensical, often goofy and carefree, with one of my greatest attributes being the ability to listen. It has always been a pleasure of mine to listen to what others have to say. Everyone is important and everyone has something they need to tell someone else. But, not everyone has the patience to just.....listen to them.

Aging and living a full life has taught me how important all of life's lessons are, whether good, bad, or indifferent.

Now that I am older, the level of my intelligence, I've determined, is not measured by an I.Q. rating or how many Facebook quizzes have been aced recently. Rather, it is based upon the observance of what is going on and being said and being acted upon (or not) within this amazing world we live in. 

Admittedly, we now live in a world of massive doses of positive and negative stimulus, mainly due to social media. Does having all of this information, literally at our fingertips, make us smarter? Or, is it information overload at its most ineffectiveness? Having graciously earned senior adult status, I have a few things to say about this.....

While I was living out my childhood under the thumb of the authority figures who impacted everyday life, I, more than likely, was making mental notes about what was going on within my own small world. Did I know or care about who the President of the United States was, what his job or purpose was? No.

What I did note was what influenced me the most at the time, which included how my parents treated one another, what my closest relatives (including grandparents) taught us about the world and the people around us, the importance of an older brother obtaining a college education, and the unimportance of girls, in general, achieving that same goal. How all young girls needed to protect their innocence, remain chaste, and never give in to their instinctive feelings or emotions. And yet....a boy wasn't considered a man until he had had sex for the first time! No double-standards here!!

When you stop to think about it, children growing up in the 1950's were primed and in full acceptance of their beliefs and experiences that were to follow in the mid-1960's. 

Simply stated....we had had enough!

We evolved into free-thinkers with an education and the ability to discuss with our peers the challenges, insecurities, and inequalities that made-up our lives, including the working establishment that we knew we could not avoid if we were to survive in this world. We remembered how many of our Mothers had been treated as second-class citizens by our own Fathers. How our relatives preached white supremacy under the guise of self-protection from the Negros that could do us bodily harm. And, how, as a young woman, we were guilty of 'leading men on' by the style of clothes we wore, if we filed our nails in the public eye, or if the kids we hung around with lived on the 'wrong side' of the tracks. Ah! No bigotry or racism there!

Sitting here pounding the keys of my i-Pad today, having already lived through many Presidents, some bad and some better than most, it's difficult to wake up in the morning without thinking about what is transpiring on the political scene today, in this case somewhere between Washington D.C. and a golden tower on Fifth Avenue in New York City. I, literally, attempt to suppress my feelings of fear and anxiety about the future by keeping myself away from cable news and Facebook. How's that working for you, kid? Admittedly, not very well. 

Always questioning what is going on around me, I decided to analyze the slogan made famous on the 'chapeau rouge' worn by this President-elect throughout his campaign. "Make America Great Again!" Thinking back far into my own childhood, I tried to recall what made America great back then and for whom was it so great and wonderful? 

Certainly not for many females, especially when, even in the mid to late 1960's, they were told that sending them to college was a waste of time and money. Certainly not for the poor who earned minimum wages while attempting to put food on the table each day. Certainly not for a person of color who had to fight for his/her equality every waking moment and were chided and controlled by a military force known as the local police. And, certainly not for the lonely, oppressed Mother who made the decision not to have more children even if it meant bleeding to death by a wire coat hanger knowing that this was the only way she had control of her own body......

Basic control over what others may say and do.....is that what this new administration believes will make America great again? 

In Baton Rouge, Louisiana earlier this week, after having recently won the title of Person of the Year by Time Magazine, the President-elect was openly complaining to his constituents that this title used to be called Man of the Year before adapting to the (in his words) politically correct version of 'Person.' Evidently, making America manly once again by not acknowledging the hard work of women or the presence of strong women within our society, will aid him in making America great again!!!

Being a woman and having two strong woman as daughters who, in turn, have introduced to the world three amazingly intelligent daughters of their own.....  I REFUSE to go backwards into the future. Especially, not back into the dark ages of our country's history where equality among people as a whole was non-existent, most men and women had no designs on their own destiny, and absolute power was in the hands of a few rich, mature white men.

The definitive progress made by mankind in the last several decades that was guided by mutual respect and understanding for one another is about as far back in time as I choose to go. Most of us have worked way too hard to have all of our long fought battles reversed by people who just wanted to shake-up our government, take back jobs that have been mechanized and are non-existent, who failed to understand that lies and deception are the new rules and guidelines set-up by the very person they voted for, and taking the benefits of a decent life of education, health care, earned rights of Social Security benefits and Medicare back into the dark ages.

If 'The Dumbing-Up of America' serves the handful of filthy rich and greedy characters that desire to deny Americans their basic freedoms, then hope will go by the wayside. The once great United States of America will tumble into a heap of rubble that cannot and will not be respected by the rest of the world. That decline has already become evident to many of us.

Is it too late, fellow Americans, to 'Make America Smart Again?' If it isn't, we had better get our act together NOW and do something to renew our Hope and Faith in a nation that is quickly melting into the hands of foreign powers, unhealthy greed, and the frigid bonds of dictatorship.

Copyright © 2016 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

                                                                                  

AGING WITH GRACE: Praise For Strong, Loving Women

A series of essays.....

MY AUNT JUNE: "A COLLECTION OF WARM SMILES
SPRINKLED WITH A WRY SENSE OF HUMOR"

.....as seen through my eyes! 




By: Jacqueline E. Hughes


Yes, I continue to age each day and there is absolutely nothing I can do about it! Coming to terms with the fact that aging is inevitable, eases the negativity behind it.....to a certain degree.

Of course, it doesn't hurt to love yourself, too! I mean, what's the point of living day-in and day-out with somebody you don't have the utmost respect for....? Yourself. After all, I spend most of my time with, well, me....especially as a writer when I find myself traversing the intricate corridors of my brain nearly twenty-four/seven. I figure I had better be there for me, over anyone else I can think of.

The funny part is, especially as I age and learn more about myself, I pray that I will have no regrets. I have been told that my personality can come-off being a bit strong and too boisterous at times thus appearing to intimidate those around me. Growing older (or, as I refer to it, finally growing-up), I know the simple truth is that my passion seeps out in great, hot waves that crash onto the projected rocks having sharp, jagged edges that can harm the sensibilities of those within my circle. My ideas, stories, and intimate connection with the imagination that feeds me on a daily basis, sensationalizes the ordinary, and highlights the mundane, can be stronger than I could ever estimate. It is what defines me as a person.

Peering out from my often lonely, internal existence, I find comfort in a world splashed in vibrant colors, draped in miles of attractive fabrics, and scented with the perfume of a thousand exotic flowers! It is a good place to be. Sipping my steaming mug of green tea with honey and lemon, I quietly slip back into my surreal existence,
eventually!

I firmly believe that, as we age, we become more aware of those aging gracefully around us: a spouse, friends, immediate family members, and even public figures. And, as with many strong women, we seek-out other strong women with personalities that captivate us with their tenderness and loving attitudes towards life in general. It is an extreme pleasure to be able to acknowledge women around my own age that inspire me every single day. I would like to point a few of them out to you.

Allow me to introduce my adorable, Aunt June. Ninety-two years ago the earth was blessed by her arrival. Being the second born and having three male siblings, my father being her older brother, I can totally identify with many trials and tribulations she may have encountered given this identical birth order myself. Aunt June is the 'purple salad'  greatly anticipated and eagerly consumed every family reunion in August. She is a collection of warm smiles sprinkled with a wry sense of humor that often offsets her petite yet classic and well groomed stature. She is a fireball of energy and excitement who is always 'up' on current events and undeniably opinionated in her own right.

We totally lost touched as I grew older, married, and started a family of my own. Several years ago, not long after the birth of our first grandchild, Brenna, Aunt June and I were reconnected here in Florida when she and Uncle Louis rented a property during the winter months in Winter Haven. It was the best reunion of my life as it was peppered, once again, with her smiles and feisty humor.

Since the passing of Uncle Louis five years ago, she lives in her home located in South Bend, Indiana and we see one another as often as we can. Otherwise, Aunt June and I have become 'phone buddies' and have been known to ignore the passing of time for hours on end. She has become a best friend, surrogate mom, and a human sounding board by whom I channel my good and bad days as they are then deciphered and categorized by their relative importance. I admire this lady with all my being and often tell her that when I grow-up......I want to be just like her! Aging gracefully is her power and she's been blessed with the strength to endure just about any scenario placed before her.

Yes....I'm With Her!! How could I not be? Hillary Clinton, if you haven't noticed by now, is in the news quite a bit lately as she makes her run for President of the United States. I have reason to believe that the battle brewing between her and Bernie Sanders right now can be classified as 'mild' compared to the knock-down, drag-out fight she will soon encounter with the New York real estate mogul.

I do not feel the least bit sorry for him.

Hillary is a strong, brilliant woman who has had to endure one drama after another in her life of both a personal and public (political) nature and survived, if not made stronger and better prepared, as she emerged on the other side. Facing a male dominant world filled with its 'good 'ole boys' status hell-bent (even in 2016) on not accepting all human beings as equals, she consistently handles herself with decorum coupled with expert knowledge regarding ways to continue the progressive movement of this country and its citizens. As a mother, grandmother, and stubborn woman myself, I praise her tenacity and will always believe that she is highly qualified and sensitized towards the direct needs of all men, women, and children, with no exceptions.

No Presidential election should ever be based upon the physical traits of anyone. If that were the case, I wonder how many of our past male presidents would ever be elected today. Hillary Clinton ages gracefully right before us as she displays the charm of a loving woman who understands the value of wrapping her arms around us, helping the pain subside, and then applying a feasible solution in order to make us better and stronger. Hillary Clinton makes me proud to be a woman. Simple as that. She makes me proud to pass her female legacy down to my own daughters and granddaughters. She is setting a precedent for strong, little girls who desire to embrace their future head-on.

I could go on indefinitely mentioning female mentors, leaders, and artists who have changed the world through their powerful influence and talent: Mother Teresa, Oprah Winfrey, Margaret Sanger (opened the first family planning clinic in the United States), Virginia Woolf (author), Marie Curie (scientist), Sheryl Sandberg (author and COO of Facebook), Hillary Clinton, Marie Bracquemond (Impressionist artist), and Gloria Steinem, just to name a few.

Nurturing and being compassionate....that is what we do best as women. That is where we excel. We seem to always get things done. Whether we are mothers, teachers, doctors, or friends that genuinely care about one another, women are strong role models for others. And, as we age, we value more and more the inspiration of other women in our lives and use this strength to move forward into the realm of equalization with our male counterparts.

My personal goal, when it comes to aging with dignity and grace, has always been with regard to how well I have raised my own daughters. I am blessed with two strong, loving, and nurturing ladies who are generously passing these traits down to their own children every day.

Concentrating on the spiritual influences in my life these days, I open my heart and my arms to the power and grace of Love. You may have already noticed this recurring theme throughout my writing and with good reason. Strength, Love, and the Power to Forgive will guide each of us, man or woman, down the right path to aging....with dignity and grace.



Copyright © 2016 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved

JOYEUX ANNIVERSAIRE....HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

A series of essays.....

.....as seen through my eyes!



By: Jacqueline E. Hughes



BIRTHDAYS........

are intimate reminders of the progression of life; a sweet, generous time to reflect upon the past and look forward with joy to what awaits us in the future. Birthdays are the exception to the rule when it comes to living in the moment. A twenty-four hour sabbatical from the ordinary by which we deviate from daily routine, celebrate each amazing breath we take, and challenge our efforts to advance as a soldier making a push toward the incomprehensible sea.....limitless, boundless, infinite, vast.

Markers....like small road signs clicking off each mile of the super highway, the years pass by with the sun's glare bouncing off reflective aluminum surfaces, teardrops of rain sliding down a cool, smooth veneer, and numerical significance masked behind Winter's accumulation of sleet and snow. Tick...tick....tick. We carry-on with each revolution, rubber meeting the road, as our mind advances the count and our heart begins to understand the inequitableness of this journey. There is no reverse on this stick shift. Best to allow our hair to fly freely in the wind and truly enjoy the freedom of the open road......every day.

As the single, tiny flame simulates the frenzied dance of a whirling dervish, the addition of each flame accumulates to resemble a 'bonfire of life,' a talisman of experience that sits proudly atop confectionary bliss to be shared by everyone participating in this magnificent celebration. The yearling son or daughter is given his own small cake to devour as he sees fit with the gusto and creativity displayed by this ritual, perhaps, foreshadowing his life's potential and style. The candle's golden glow highlights each wrinkle of the centenarian who basks in the satisfaction and rewards of a job well done, surrounded by friends and generations of family that carry on his legacy in the guise of an upturned nose or a feisty temper......!

Alone. Many of us glide through this world within a solitary bubble, our purpose for living never surfacing to the top level of comprehension, we free fall like an autumn leaf newly released from the Tree of Life. The breeze shifts and blows us about while sets of various circumstances attract us like metal shards to a magnet, certain conditions or events control our actions as we float down to gather among the other silent souls on the ground. Even surrounded by the multitudes, we can be alone, ticking off the years in a silent quest for closure, bringing an end to the crushing pain inside. My birthday wish for you would be the accumulation of an abundance of hope in your life and love in your heart. Only then would you be able to understand your purpose for living. Only then would you not be fearful, sad, and alone as you grow older.

Birthdays can be more about giving to others than about receiving from them. There is a similar reasoning behind many of us who find it difficult to accept praise or high recognition for things we've accomplished. Let's face it.....it is easier to give than to receive. Some may not agree with this. However, we have been known to blush at the prospect of praise yet, forthrightly seek it out by making the effort of being the best person we can be.

This ritual of 'giving and receiving' extends to many traditions and life changing events. We gather at weddings to honor the bride and groom and 'gift' them in order to make their future life together more abundant and enjoyable. The bride and groom give us 'tokens' of their appreciation, feed us, and let us eat cake in celebration. Marie Antoinette would have understood!

Age. Another word for experience, a badge of courage and the continuance of comfort and pride worn like a familiar hat for years and shaped to the contours of our head. Age reminds us that we have something wonderful to show for time well spent with our tiny scars worn proudly. We should not allow the exterior to overshadow the marvelous beauty of our mind and soul. Wrinkles are inevitable; acting old is not.

Often, the body ages as the mind remains vibrant and young, open to new ideas, and still eager to learn about many of the old ones. This may be the most appropriate meaning and application of The Fountain of Youth, highly coveted and sought after. Thankfully, the external signs of aging can be a long, slow process especially when one consciously leads a healthy lifestyle including exercise and eating well. After all, good health holds the key to happiness and may be the freshwater source that restores (in this case, maintains) the youthful qualities of anyone who drinks or bathes in its waters.

No two individuals feel the same way about or celebrate their birthdays in an identical manner. Being surrounded by several close friends may be the ticket. Renting a large hall and dancing the night away with hundreds of others may be your thing. Naturally, we know that conditions may be enhanced or restrained by certain economic and social positions.     
 
As for myself, knowing that I am loved allows me to enjoy the day of my birth to the fullest! My family and many friends may live miles away, but I always feel the warmth of their love each year. They all serve as intimate reminders of my life's progression and I am eternally grateful to them for this. And, the sweet joy of grandchildren is like the proverbial 'cherry on top.' I am very blessed.

By the way, no cupcakes for me! A generous portion of carrot cake with cream cheese frosting and a scoop of vanilla ice cream, please. Oh, and you can hold the candles for now. We all know that the smoke from just one candle will carry my prayers to the heavens and represent the Light of Life. Besides, reaching centenarian status is a long way off.....for now. I will celebrate with a big bonfire then.


Copyright © 2015 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved

LONG LIVE ANNIE LENNOX

A series of essays.....





PINK HYDRANGEA IN THE SPOTLIGHT

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes
Little insights and stories that have caught my attention over the past week.  Sharing some of them with you during this Valentine's week of celebration.....with Love.

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NELLE LEE HARPER: THEN AND NOW

LITTLE NELLE

What an amazing name Harper is.  I read once that her first name is Nelle.  Nelle Harper Lee.  Always wondered why she published under her middle name of Harper.  Not really such a surprise given the fact that Nelle is such a feminine, nostalgic and 'girlie' name.  I surmise that to sell this book back in 1960, a book filled with such poignant prejudice and striking inequities, Harper was dealing with some prejudices of her own. 

A female and first time author, Nelle probably did pretty much what she had been told to do by her editor even if it included changing her main character, Scout, from a woman returning home after many years into a young girl coming-of-age in the South. 

Nelle listened, but at what price?  And, I'm not too sure, having read her biography and taken-in some of her references towards naïveté and being an outcast as a child due to an extremely 'Tomboyish' personality, that these factors didn't project her as a hardworking young female pushing the parameters of a 'Man's World.' 

Did it break her?  Had she had enough with the publication of her one book?  No matter how many accolades they bestowed upon her, including a Pulitzer Prize and making her novel into a movie in 1962, soon to become a classic in its own right, did she say the sacrifice really wasn't worth it anymore and moved-on with her life? 

I will be lining-up to buy and read her prequel, as I refer to it instead, Go Set a Watchman, because it had been written before her editor intervened!  Of course, it will be expected and natural even to contrast and compare it with To Kill a Mockingbird.  I hope Nelle is braced and ready for the bumpy ride!

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EMBRACE THE OPPORTUNITY TO GROW OLD!

OH, BETTE.....SAY IT AIN'T SO!

We all do it every single day.  It's certainly a fact of life.  And, even though each of us had no initial input in the matter, we merge into the fast lane of 'Life' the moment we are born!  At this time, the precise second of birth.....we begin the aging process.

Katherine Hepburn once said, "If you survive long enough, you're revered.....rather like an old building." 

And, the most honest quote I have ever heard about aging comes from Bette Davis when she would proclaim in many interviews, "Old age isn't for sissies!"

It's inevitable, people!  But, what if we looked at aging in a positive light and stopped fearing it instead?  Taking fear out of the equation  allows us to free ourselves of uncontrollable burdens and encourages  us to live in an enlightened present.  Instead of dreading aging, this new mindset can help us embrace the opportunity to grow old. 

During our first visit to Europe in 1990, I set my agenda for capturing certain subjects and ideas on film.  They included lace-curtained windows from every country and town we visited.  My lens recorded small children simply living another day with family or playing with friends.  Most importantly was my desire to focus on the aging 'senior citizens' and define their emotions via each well-earned wrinkle, gray hair and stooped shoulder I could find. 

What I realized I had done, while looking over my photos upon  returning home, was capture my aging self in each one of them! Even though I had yet to reach the age of forty, I could imagine my subjects as my future self and applauded their resilience instead.  I was now free to reimagine the elderly and identify them with long life rather than physical deterioration.

Each photo showed me people who remained engaged with life and encapsulated a spirit of enthusiasm rather than resignation.  This process of life called aging is lifelong and as we plant the seeds of our existence early on, we must always be self-conscious of what we will have to harvest in the future. 

Oh, the original stories I could have added to each photo would be absolutely priceless to me today!  I wonder.....there's still time, isn't there?

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IRONICALLY....ANNIE'S LATEST ALBUM

OKAY...SO, LONG LIVE ANNIE LENNOX, MY FRIENDS!!!

I don't believe we actually used this terminology 'back in the day,' but I totally had a 'woman crush' on Annie Lennox when I first heard her perform as a member of the Eurythmics.  I loved so many things about Annie then as I do to this very day including her hairstyle, her enthusiasm, the rhythm and depth of her vocal style and her exciting, raw talent.  Talk about a Cheshire Cat smile......Wow!

Seeing Annie perform on the 2015 Grammy Awards this past Sunday alongside Hozier was the highlight of the evening for me!!  When Take Me To Church segued into I Put a Spell On You, and Annie literally belted out the lyrics, I looked at the expression on the face of Hozier standing a few feet away and saw a combination of humility and adoration I hadn't seen on someone's face for a very long time! 

Annie has always declared to be a feminist...."A man-loving feminist," she proclaims load and clear.  When asked by Rolling Stone what being a feminist means to her, Annie states that after traveling the globe and having visited developing countries, "I see women that don't even have the absolute basic rights........fundamental human rights that we have taken for granted.  In the Western world, women have the vote.  We have the possibility to be lawyers and doctors and to have careers that we never would have dreamed of years ago.  Women before us sacrificed so much to help the future generations of women...  What's happened is the word 'feminism' got trashed and completely devalued.  Now the time has come to reconfigure it and take feminism to places where women have no sexual, reproductive, health or educational rights.  It's not about whether you shave your legs or wear high heels.  That's irrelevant."

Annie Lennox the philanthropist has indeed traveled the world and helped raise awareness and funds for the education and health care for those affected by HIV and AIDS.  She has conversed with the influential world leaders, Nelson Mandela and Desmond Tutu, in order to help manifest her humanitarian work in Africa and South Africa.  In 2013 she received the Music Industry Trusts Award for her career achievements in music and her charity commitments.

In this same interview with Rolling Stone, Annie explains that after dropping out of the Academy of Music in London because she felt out of place there, she had become exposed to the genius of Joni Mitchell.  "We heard this extraordinary poetry, this extraordinary voice, this extraordinary and beautiful woman, so articulate, just beyond, playing these amazing instruments.  And she was just flawless.  She still is flawless for me.  I don't think there's ever been anybody to match Joni Mitchell."  And, I agree completely.

Moderately successful in the late 1970's in the new wave band The Tourist, this Scottish born "White Soul Singer" and her fellow musician, Dave Stewart, went on to achieve major international success in the 1980's as the Eurythmics.  Annie has compiled a long list of individual hit records and albums that have withstood the test of time and musical diversity and continue to resonate with fans both young and old.

Born Andrew Hozier-Byrne on St. Patrick's Day twenty-three years ago in Ireland, Hozier already has good reason to feel pride in sharing the stage with Annie Lennox.  Take Me To Church is a critique of oppressive institutions and directly addresses gay discrimination in Russia.  To this I say....AMEN, AMEN, AMEN!

Working side-by-side, these two anomalies (as in abnormally talented individuals), Annie Lennox and Hozier have succeeded in Putting A Spell on the Grammys as well as every one of us fortunate enough to have witnessed their epic performance.

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GRAMMY AWARD

IMPORTANT AWARDS

If I were to give out Grammy awards for the most important performance of the evening, non-music related, one would go to President Obama for his critical pre-filmed message when he urged all of us to join the campaign against domestic violence.  The second award would be handed to Brooke Axtell, a survivor of domestic violence,  who brilliantly related her personal journey of abuse by the man she loved and married.  It chilled me to the bone.....and, I honor her for helping to open-up our eyes to this horrific charade into a dark world of pain and deceit.   

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'THE KISS' BY AUGUSTE RODIN

THE KISS

"I love this room!  It is so amazing!"

"It's really nice.  I'm going to check-out the bathroom.  Oh, a bit small, but it's neat and clean."

"Oh, look, look, look.....  I have to wedge myself up next to the bed, but, there.  Now I can swing open the window.  Funny, it's a step-up onto the window ledge.  I can do this."

"Be careful.  Is there room for two out there?"

"Barely!  You can try it, but it's kind of tight.  Listen to that.  I am so happy to have gotten a room on the street-side rather than the inside courtyard.  Aren't you? Even if the balcony is tiny."

"Made it.  Wow!  Look at that wrought iron grill!  It is nice out here."

"I know.  We can hear the traffic of Paris and listen to the people passing by down below.  The hustle and bustle of life."

"Can't quite see the Eiffel Tower though."

"They said that the École Militaire would just block our view." 

"Say, I have an idea.  How tired are you right now?  I know it's late, but we could find a café and grab a bite to eat and then walk by la Tour Eiffel, cross over the Seine and be at l'Arc de Triomphe in about a thirty minute stroll."

"It's already eleven o'clock at night, Paris time...."

"Well, it was only a th......"

"I didn't say no.  Just analyzing the situation.  I think it sounds perfect!  Should we unpack first or just go?"

"We'll have plenty of time to unpack later.....even in the morning before breakfast.  Personally, I am starving!"

"Me, too.  That was quite the long cab ride from the Charles de Gaulle!"

"The cabby was fun though.  He told some great stories, didn't he?"

"Hope I can remember some of them to jot down tomorrow."

"We have a date with Auguste Rodin bright and early in the morning remember?  The Thinker up close and personal....amazing!"

PARIS SUNRISE

"And, The Kiss and his studio.....  Let me shut the window.  Oh, it's so beautiful out there!  I want to get up early enough in the morning to stand out on the balcony and take some photos....maybe as the sun is rising.  If I time it just right, it might be shining through that beautiful iron grill."

"Come here first.  There's something I've wanted to do since we got back to Paris.  Rodin had the right idea about that kiss....."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."



            
 HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!
                


Copyright © 2015 By Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved
                                 

THE APPLICATION OF LIFE

Classic Thursday.......





~~Lydia Kaprice With Her Great Grandma, Marceline Robertson~~

......as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes


I may call this an 'author's repost' or fundamentally, "Gone fishing in the archives for this special one!"  Maybe this comes under the heading of 'Classic Thursday.'  Whatever it is to be called, I always feel it's important to go back a little in time and allow work from a few years ago to resurface, come up for air and take a deep, deep breath once again.  As a writer, it's important to see where you've been in order to realize which direction you are heading in.  

This post was originally written in celebration of a friend's birthday.  Rereading it, after giving it a slight dusting-off, the original intent,  celebrating our life from infancy through adulthood by weaving one component, Love, constantly within the fabric of our existence, encourages us to be stronger, responsible and creative humans.  The message stays as relevant today as back then, as it will tomorrow or a thousand years from now.

Enjoy....





Originally Posted 08/20/2010

Ode To Those Of Us Turning Sixty

Like mist rolling into a dream that gently wraps all thoughts, all perspectives within its opaque wisdom....life proceeds on a daily basis as we take baby steps along this abstract journey.  We struggle to stand and to walk and to speak and to communicate with others around us…..as we observe their personal creation of the dance of life through every second, minute, hour, day, month, year and decade of breath that escapes between their ruby red lips.

We are infants morphing into adults with so much exotic pain and exquisite joy accompanying our movements that we’ve been known to cry to the heavens either in shock or  ecstasy during any given day.  On quiet days we curl into ourselves and specifically fail to ask the question, “Why?” deeply afraid of the answer and genuinely appreciative of the minute respite, knowing our emotions will attack us, once again, tomorrow…….

All too swiftly we become the adult form of the beautiful infant of our past carrying the trappings of adulthood upon our shoulders like our Father once carried us, high above the snakes that slithered around his shoes…..making us tall and momentarily secure.  Unfortunately, he let us down from that lofty place in so many ways.  On our own , survival is imperative as we hopscotch our way between the serpents and manage  incredible bites of sustenance in the form of hard work,  hard play and profound moments of sweet, enduring love…….lovers, spouse, children, grandchildren line-up to create this undeniable bond of such magnitude and strength….we are blown away by its power.

We become survivors.  Like a flash of lightning in the evening sky, the electricity flows through our earthly bodies with such creative power that we in turn charge the world around us and continue the ebb and flow of eternal life.  Such power and responsibility within us is, simply put, enormous!  Love….   



Have a Beautiful Day!

Copyright © 2014 Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved

UNLEASH THE DRAGON

Blog: Life.....

~~~~TIME~~~

.....seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes


Is it the excitement or, is my tummy feeling a bit queasy due to the nerves and restlessness I'm experiencing?  I really don't know.....!

I do know that the older you become, time has had the opportunity to wrap its lacy, white fingers snugly around you like an old, comfortable  blanket.  You have either become satisfied and relaxed with this current 'relationship' or, mildly to severely dissatisfied with the physical being you've evolved into.  

Petty.....perhaps.  The word, typical, would fit more appropriately.  Yet we do it anyway,  ego driven creatures that we are!  

This leads me back to my fear and trepidation.....and, how I am meeting three ladies for lunch today.  Beautiful ladies with whom I share a piece of history.  Granted, our time together lies fairly deep in our past, around our high school and college days and just a bit beyond. Nevertheless, our paths have crossed, we share memories....stories together, time in space sometimes misplaced but, never forgotten.

Would this luncheon be taking place without our connection with social media?  There is a possibility that it would not.  Or, maybe, it was simply good timing....fate, if you will, that has brought us back together after all these years apart.  We sowed our wild oats.  We married.  We raised beautiful children who are now raising their own.  We traveled to exotic places and took field trips on the hard-seated school bus in order to be with our sons and daughters as they discovered the world.  We laughed and we cried on our terms and accepted or denied, at times, the paths that were taken and attempted to justify in our minds each choice we made.  

And, that's okay!  It just took time.  It always takes time.  Life.....all those things you attempt to fit into a window of precious, fleeting time.

Karl Jay Shapiro, an American poet, once wrote, "Upon his silver hairs, time, like a Panama hat, sits at a tilt and smiles...."  The passing of time has mocked me all these years and deceived me into believing that my 'laugh lines' are not wrinkles, the silver strands that crown my head can be camouflaged by various shades of manufactured color and sufficient doses of glucosamine supplements will make my joint pain a distant memory.  I know the truth when my reflection stares back at me in the mirror and that wide-brimmed hat sitting arrogantly upon my head shifts ever so slightly under the weight of its smile....

What will my long ago friends think of the mature woman I have become in their absence?  

So, my ego has awakened the sleeping dragon. 

 

Continued......

Note: This week I am in Michigan with my Family enjoying being together and creating more fantastic memories!!  Tonight I am painting a picture with Ali and Corinne as we enjoy a glass of wine or two.  Should be an interesting evening....  Love to all!

 

 

 

REBIRTH: PROLOGUE

Series of short stories....

Through My Eyes....

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes



The woman sits at the breakfast nook sipping her second cup of coffee of the morning and stares out at the swimming pool which lies beyond the thick panes of glass of the cozy little room. The gentle rainfall is sifted through the screen enclosure and reminds her of confectioner's sugar being used to decorate baked sweets. Instantly her outdoor scene is illuminated by shafts of golden light as the cloud cover parts just enough to allow the glorious sun to take stage front and center. She's been down here long enough now to have witnessed this spectacular scene often and never takes for granted the heavenly merging of water and light that has certainly produced a Kodak moment up in the sky somewhere beyond the roofline of the neighboring houses.

Deftly unscrewing the cover of the carafe in front of her a half a turn, she proceeds to pour herself another cup of the steaming brew while subconsciously humming an old familiar tune. John Fogarty wants to know if she's ever seen the rain coming down on a sunny day? as she twists the cover closed once again. Chuckling to herself, she takes pride in the fact that the music produced in the '60's and '70's thrives today and has gratefully been passed down through the years to remain as popular as ever.

Often she thinks of herself in this same way; produced in the '50's yet thriving sixty-one years later and humming a CCR tune while sitting under an unseen Floridian rainbow. This makes her very happy and a smile slowly spreads across her smooth, unblemished face.

She lifts the coffee mug up towards her and sees the picture of two of her young grandchildren emblazoned in living color on its front.....a perfect gift for Mother's Day. A perfect gift because they live so far away now. Life has changed so much for her within the last twelve months or so, at least how she had come to perceive her life to be. She has never been afraid of change, at least not before last year, that is. For her, now, change has become unbearable at times. After all, she is living in a new, unstable world and lifestyle changes have blindsided her life so often lately.

Gently scooting away from the glass tabletop, the woman walks to the sink to rinse out her precious mug and proceeds to place it in the dishwasher. She knows that Life can be wonderful. Having five adorable grand babies to love proves that. Having an adoring, attentive husband proves that. Knowing that together they have raised two fantastic daughters, also proves how important her life has been for so many others who comfortably reside within it. Doesn't it? She asks herself why does she feel so sad most of the day? Is it normal to be able to smile while thinking of rainbows, music and beautiful babies and then do a one-eighty into the dumpster ten beats later? She thinks that it never use to be that way....... Now, it's a fact of her life.

She notes that the sun has conquered the best efforts of the morning drizzle and is quickly drying off the shell embedded pavers that surround the custom-shaped pool. She remembers how much fun it was to design their pool almost seven years ago and to implement texture and color into the design with good use of tiles, Pebble-Tech finishes and brass Fleur de Lis fountains adorning the backdrop she now associates with having her morning coffee. She remembers the many hours her husband slaved landscaping around the pool deck perimeter as a stone retaining wall was built to contain the earth around the structure because the elevation of the backyard rose some three feet above the level of the foundation of the house itself. At least they could retain the young live oak tree that lives to the right of the pool on a small hill. She's amazed at how that smallish tree now lords over pool, yard and house today.

Grandchildren, pets and armies of small lizards have marched repeatedly along the network of narrow stone paths they created to nurture her desire.....no, her need to assimilate a life in France, complete with a small bistro table and two small chairs glazed over with characteristic rust from living out among the elements for so long. The table is tucked behind the house and resides under the infamous oak tree. She can remember purchasing each one of the cobalt blue ceramic pots of various sizes and shapes that flank the paths offering a visual of deep color on the outside, as well as muted colors from the seasonal arrangements of plants and flowers growing from the aromatic soil within. Often her mantra is "nothing dies in Florida" and she has many resurrected plants to prove this theory considering her thumb has never taken on any known shade of the color green. She chuckles to herself whenever this theory is wishfully applied to humankind. "What an interesting world that would be" is an understatement.

Detecting movement out of the corner of her eye, she turns slightly to see three scrawny squirrels playing a game of tag along the tall fence behind the pool. If her dog wasn't napping under the window in their spare bedroom, he certainly would be, tail wagging wildly, begging her to be 'let out' beyond the massive sliding glass door that separates him from his chattering foe. She harbors animosity toward the critters herself recalling the damage to property they've inflicted by chewing through the plastic water lines of the solar panels up on the roof used to heat the pool. "Those damn rodents!," her husband would shout, secretly wishing a timely demise to each and every one of them. She thinks his Irish intensity is still both sexy and cute and remains a huge part of his charm after all of their years together.

For her, life has become a compilation of positives vs. negatives with her emotions running the gambit from very high to very low in a matter of minutes. And, she knows that because she voluntarily removed herself from working outside the parameter of her home office over eight years ago, whom she believed to be close friends and ex-working associates, blew away in time like crisp autumn leaves in a soft breeze.......like so many things in her life. No one to talk with or pour her heart out to when highs became lows and she needed them most; whenever her soul and spirit craved the understanding and sympathy of another female. She knows that she's always been told what a 'good listener' she is herself which has contributed greatly to her profession. More often than not, she became the listener during rare workday lunches or Saturday morning breakfasts at the airport Cracker Barrel where comfort food and a sympathetic ear were served-up as if both were a part of the restaurant's bulky, extensive menu. But these sessions dwindled and disappeared as 'life' got in the way and everyone navigated towards tiny pockets of family protectiveness as rough economic times began to threaten the security and innocent hopefulness associated with living from day to day. Old friendships just blew apart in the wind.

Taking her wandering thoughts with her, the woman navigates the short hallway that connects the main living area to her working office space. She finds their shaggy housemate is now warming the soft wool area rug that anchors the oversized oak desk and warm leather chair......her second home.......as he patiently awaits her routine arrival. She firmly believes that in the time it takes to drink three mugs of steaming hot coffee and throw her own "pity party" while doing it, she's more than ready to tackle, hmm, twenty-five to thirty solid pages this morning?! If she is lucky......

Copyright © 2014 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved

Photo © 2014 Jacqueline E. Hughes