COFFEEHOUSE CHATTER ~ MOLLY AND LYDIA

A series of essays.....

'THE CASE OF THE MYSTERIOUS NEIGHBORS'
MOLLY AND LYDIA

Courtesy of U of M Medical Center

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

From time to time, our neighborhood friends meet at the corner coffeehouse to relax, sip their favorite brew or concoction, and warm-up their hands and hearts...together!

Some might think of their meeting as a 'cleansing or purification of the soul.' Even though they may share similar backgrounds and values, their ideas and opinions are as diverse as the weather outside of the little shop.

Let's grab a cup of our own, take a comfortable seat, and sit back and listen to what today's chapter of 'Coffeehouse Chatter' has to offer....

                     Courtesy of New Perspectives
                 

Molly and Lydia have been friends since Lydia moved into the neighborhood, several houses down the block from Molly, nearly five years ago. They are young grandmothers who share their love for their families and take pride in their adorable grandchildren. Each Wednesday morning, rain or shine, they meet and walk to the corner coffeehouse to catch-up on activities from the past week. These ladies wouldn't miss their Wednesday mornings for anything in the world!

MOLLY: (Walking up the steps as Lydia emerges from her front door) Grab your umbrella, Sweetheart.....it's going to be a rough morning!

LYDIA: What? Oh, my goodness! Hold on just a second. (A moment later) There, let it pour. I am equipped for beast and foul weather. Bring them on!

MOLLY: No doubt. That thing is enormous, Lydia!

LYDIA: I know. It's Fred's golfing umbrella and the first one I grabbed from the stand. 

MOLLY: Well, let's hope you don't have to open it because, with a proper gust of wind, it could become airborne and lift your tiny little self straight up just like a scene out of Mary Poppins. 

LYDIA: Oh, Molly. Let's just pick-up the pace and beat the rain, shall we? I'm not in the mood to feign an excuse for looking like a drowned rat this morning. Besides, I have so much to tell you I can hardly contain myself.

(Five minutes later they walk into their local coffeehouse)

LYDIA: Let's find a table first so that I can unload this cumbersome umbrella before we order. If Fred ever had to use this thing on the golf course, I swear he could fit the entire foursome under it.

MOLLY: You find a table and I'll go place our order. A croissant for you this morning?

LYDIA: Mais oui. Please ask if they still have their delicious fig jam, won't you?

MOLLY: (Seating herself near her friend on the cushioned banquette) There. Cathy said she'd bring our order out as soon as it's up. Now....you get to go first. I am dying to hear your story. You seem quite anxious about it, Lyds.

LYDIA: I think the neighbors across the street from me have murdered someone!!!

MOLLY: What on earth are you talking about?

LYDIA: Maybe more than just one someone. More like several people, by the looks of it, with so many trips made out to the car over the past few weeks. Get that silly look off of your face, Molly. Fred thinks I'm crazy, too. He believes, or hopes, it's just my writer's vivid imagination kicking in and making me come up with my conclusion of murder and mayhem. 

MOLLY: Well, I conclude that Fred is right. You must be crazy!!

LYDIA: I admit that it sounds crazy, at least. I'm just trying to come up with my own explanation for their strange actions. I apologize for not mentioning anything to you about this sooner.

MOLLY: (Chuckling) I'll be the first to profess that I don't know Tom and Jenny all that well. But, unless you tell me what evidence you're basing this interesting claim on, I will continue to believe you are as loony as they come. Love you. Mean it.

LYDIA: (Smiling) Hold that thought, my friend. Here comes Cathy with our goodies. Ah...thank you, Cathy. You did have the fig jam today. Perfect!

MOLLY: Thank you, Cathy. (Diving into her oversized cup of frothy cappuccino with delight) Now that I can think straight again, I want to hear all about your story. God, that jam does look good, by the way!

LYDIA: Here. Take some. It always reminds me of being in Provence in early autumn.

MOLLY: Don't change the subject. Spill the beans, Missy!

LYDIA: Okay. First of all, standard disclaimer, I never thought I'd be looking out my window spying on my neighbors and drawing conclusions about their activities. Having said that, for several weeks now I've charted their strange, repetitious behavior and it has sparked my curiosity.

MOLLY: Like what activities? Oh, Lord, she's getting me hooked, isn't she?

LYDIA: Oh, stop it! Well, Jenny will get into their SUV and Tom will come out with a large, soft-sided cooler on wheels and place it in the back of the car. The blue bag appears to be quite heavy because he has to pick it up with both hands to hoist it up into the back. 

MOLLY: Simple explanation. No big deal. They love to go on picnics. Probably have several bottles of good Rhone Rosé in there besides all of the edible delights. I have heard that Jenny has taken French cooking lessons while living in Lyon a few years ago.

LYDIA: Well, you might think so, however, when they return home each time, the bag seems just as heavy and cumbersome as when they left a few hours before. I will admit, I can't quite figure that one out yet. If they are taking body parts out in the cooler it should be lighter when they return. But, Tom struggles to lift it out from the back, just the same.

MOLLY: You can't be serious, Lyds. Are you serious?

LYDIA: Do I think they murdered someone? No. It's just that this has gone on every weekend now for weeks. Sometimes twice a day, too. My curiosity is piqued and I swear Tom's eyes shift back and forth as he's loading the cooler into the car as if he can feel my eyes boring a hole straight through him.

MOLLY: That's simply your own guilt haunting you for being so nosy. 

(She shifts her weight on the banquette and stares at her friend) Have you thought of going over to ask them outright if a rich, old aunt has come up missing within the past few weeks? Maybe you should ask if they're growing medical marijuana as a side business and selling it on the open market. You might be eligible for a share of the profits if you promise to keep hushed about it. It's possible that they're selling priceless stolen artifacts they've acquired during their many trips around the world in the black market. They use the weekends to distribute the goods and collect the money from the sales in large sums of cash....

Then, of course, there's always my picnic idea.

LYDIA: Oh, Molly! I love it when I get you going like this. You come up with some amazing storyline ideas for me when I place scenarios out there for you to ponder. 

MOLLY: (With her voice raised) So, you're just using me again for ideas? I fall for it every time, don't I? 

LYDIA: Sorry, but seeing Tom and Jenny lug that huge cooler around for weeks coincided with a story I'm writing for 'True Detective' magazine this month. You've given me some interesting plot lines.

MOLLY: (Sipping the dregs of her coffee) Okay, smarty, but have you any earthly idea as to why the cooler lugging, the shifty eyes, and the consistency of their actions across the street from you happen? Or, did you make all of that up just to solicit ideas from me?

LYDIA: (Chuckling to herself) Oh, that part is true enough. I've already asked Jenny what's up. She told me she'd mentioned to Tom that they must look very suspicious each time they leave with the cooler in the car; leaving the house with more body parts to dump. Simply, they had no choice in this summer's heat but to bring oversized ice packs in the cooler every time they went out on a Halo Top run. They didn't want the pints of ice cream to melt before they made it back home. Often they couldn't find the flavors they wanted so, they had to run from store to store all over town until they did.

MOLLY: (Laughing out loud) All of that for Halo Top ice cream? You've got to be kidding me!

LYDIA: Yep! All for the love of ice cream. It is extremely good and almost guilt free. My favorite is Caramel Macchiato, of course!

(Both friends laugh out loud until tears begin to cloud their vision)

(The skies have opened-up outside and promise to saturate the little corner of their world for quite a while longer)

MOLLY: (Calming down a little) I'd ask you to open up that enormous umbrella of yours and walk me home except it's much too nasty outside right now. I suggest we enjoy a second coffee and wait it out.

LYDIA: Sounds like a good plan to me! Besides, I've taken up most of our time with my little story. Now it's your turn...

MOLLY: Exactly what this morning is all about. Another cappuccino, an espresso, two buttery croissants, and fig jam coming right up. I really enjoy our Wednesday mornings together!

LYDIA: I do, too!

Copyright © 2017 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

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