RETIREMENT IN KALAMAZOO AND TAKING TIME TO REMINISCE

 

A series of essays….

OUR HOME AND GARDEN IN KALAMAZOO ARE PROGRESSING
NICELY. LOOKING FORWARD TO SHORT, PLANNED GETAWAYS
IN ORDER TO JUMPSTART OUR NEW TRAVEL LIFE.

….as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E Hughes

No one warned me that after my husband retired, and despite already spending over one year within Covid-19 precautionary conditions, that we would be busier than ever! 

Retirement is only a word. It is not a death sentence or even a number that defines who we are in relationship to how many years we have already spent on this earth; how much time we have left to spend. If we think or believe in finite terms only, we have already written our later years off as unimportant, unproductive, and not worth seeing through with dignity and self respect.

Finding a decent blend between working at whatever you love to do and taking breaks from everything you do in any given day, is highly important. Even if a break consists of a few minutes of meditation or sitting out on the back deck to watch golfers pretend that they are good at the game, the mental downtime is so worth it. This break reminds us of the importance of resuming whatever it is we’ve started. Being both physically and mentally sharp as we strive to do our best along the way, contributes to a much needed sense of balance in our lives.

Spending several hours each day writing is as natural to me as drinking my coffee in the morning. I can get lost in time during this period, very early in the day, and find that three hours have passed by as if I’d merely blinked them away! One of my first published poems was, ironically, entitled Time, as if losing myself between the click, click, click of the ‘second hand’ was always going to be a part of my life and I’d realized this fact a very long time ago.

Dan has lived a highly productive, full life within the construction business in various places around the country and has adapted well to learning the trade no matter what the terrain. He understands first-hand how building apartments in the middle of a snowstorm in Michigan differs from having to dynamite rock in West Virginia in order to create buildable space, and what an important role the water table plays while building in Florida. 

Today, he is spending his time remodeling our little cottage here in Kalamazoo. After everything he’s accomplished in the field of construction, you might think this would be a fairly simple task. Well, not really. Change orders still inundate his work day—only now they are coming from his wife as his client, (critic), and co-worker throughout various projects. I am the design person who relies on the brawn and expertise that I know he can deftly supply. I’m not so naive as to believe that he always feels our working relationship to be ideal, but I do know that it all seems to be working out for us with each project we complete.

Recently, with more people becoming fully vaccinated, we’ve decided that taking a short break from construction and routine could be more than sitting on the back deck relaxing and taking in the view. It’s been almost three years since we left our life and friends in Florida and It’s time to pay that life a visit and reminisce for a little while. So, with Covid-19 realities in mind, the planning stages have begun, and I couldn’t be more excited!

BRILLIANT SUNSET OVER THE GULF OF MEXICO

While we plan, life goes on and several big ticket items have definitely shaken us to the core. And, like most retirees, we question if spending money on this trip is feasible right now. Our car is in the ‘shop’ being worked on and the air conditioning unit for the house has decided it no longer desires to keep us cool and comfortable now that we’re heading into the heat of summer. (Enormous hugs and thanks to our friends who offered their air conditioned homes to help guard us from a possible meltdown. You know who you are!!) But, we still have smiles on our faces and understand these challenges to be stepping stones rather than giant boulders blocking our future plans.

I saw a post recently that featured a famous quote by the Italian filmmaker, Federico Fellini, which read: “One of the greatest handicaps is to fear a mistake. You have stopped yourself. You have to move freely into the arena, not just to wait for the perfect situation, the perfect moment… If you have to make a mistake, it’s better to make a mistake of action than one of inaction.” Sound advice for all of us who have reached retirement age and beyond.

I was fascinated by this quote because I know what it feels like to be paralyzed and do nothing while being afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing. This tactic kept me from finishing my book by feeling I was not good enough; I believed I was doing the wrong thing and not following all of the rules. I was afraid of doing or saying something “wrong” so, I did and said nothing at all. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that these so-called mistakes and fears are as bad as the mistake of doing absolutely nothing. 

I am learning—even at my age, I am learning to take action for my own life and make those mistakes with the confidence of someone who knows that she learns by her mistakes. Like a room filled with every color imaginable, I will extract energy from these colors and continue on. 

CHIMICHANGA FROM DON JULIO’S MEXICAN KITCHEN 

 CHICKEN WITH COCONUT CURRY BROTH ~
PHO VINH VIETNAMESE DINING

So, on with our plans to revisit the haunts that we loved so much in Orlando: restaurants, independent book stores, tea shops, wine bars, sandy beaches (along the Gulf and Atlantic coastline), walking the campus of Rollins College, having pedicures, and shopping at Publix grocery stores, again. Oh, how I miss my Publix! Often it’s the simple things in life that motivate us straight into our happy place. 

Dan and I like to call this trip back to Orlando our ‘littlest adventure’ that will lead the way back to epic adventures as time goes by. It’s our first set of baby steps that are walking us out of this pandemic and into a healthier future. Let us all plan away and release ourselves from the tentacles that have held us in place for so long. Besides, road trips can be as much fun (sometimes even more so) as a cross-country flight. It may take a bit longer to arrive at your final destination, but you have such diverse attractions along the way.

Please get fully vaccinated and then plan your first trip with the peace of mind that we all deserve while venturing out into the world, once again. Enjoy life to the fullest each day—because that’s what living is all about.

Copyright © 2021 by Jacqueline E Hughes

All rights reserved

Photos Copyright © 2021 by Jacqueline E Hughes

All rights reserved

RETIREMENT: A MARATHON RUN?

A series of essays....

DAN'S OFFICE ALL DECKED-OUT FOR THE BIG DAY!

....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

Retirement officially began on June 1, 2018, for Dan. The choice of withdrawing or leaving from his chosen occupation at the age of sixty-seven was his and his alone. The company he worked for would have gladly employed him for as long as Dan desired to work. They respected him as a person and thoroughly appreciated his common sense  approach to any job at hand coupled by his acquired expertise after a lengthy, successful career in the Construction business.

I WONDER IF THE AUTHOR WAS REFERRING
TO BATTLING THE
I-4 TRAFFIC EVERY MORNING?

Not many can say they were able to control their own destiny. Then again, I have to ask, do we really own control or do circumstances in our lives guide us around each twist and turn and we’re merely passengers locked into this carnival ride that’s managed by the person (computer) down below? I’d like to think it’s a bit of both; a perfect blend of free will and fate!

As I sit here in the semi-darkness of the early morning hours, snug in my library chair, i-Pad screen glowing brightly, it’s difficult for me to think that this particular pleasure is offered to me on borrowed time. Certainly the contents of this room are ours: the piano we’ve moved from home to home, the antique oak, claw-foot table separating our two comfy recliners, and the grand collection of books lined-up on shelves like soldiers awaiting their orders to whisk us away to places near and far...for our sanity and immeasurable delight!

I WILL MISS THIS MORNING VIEW

It’s the shell....the structure itself....that we built as our home twenty years ago that I speak about. By our own admission and free will, we relinquish this house to others to live, play, create memories, and love in from this day forward. Well, after signatures are signed on the dotted line in August, anyway! Our house has been sold! Unfortunately, this room I write in and love so much is a part of this sale and, it will be missed. I can only hope that the new owners fill the waiting empty shelves with their own magnificent adventures!

I digress a bit from my original thoughts about Dan’s retirement plan. Three years ago, almost to the day, we purchased our ‘little yellow cottage’ and this set the wheels of retirement into motion for us. 

We always believed in owning a ‘working retirement’ and have never bought into the ‘rocking chair with knitting in hand’ syndrome. How could we when there’s so much life out there to live! So, as the beginning of June loomed before us, we hit the ground running like a pair of soldiers landing by parachute on the battlefield and moving off as quickly as possible the moment our feet touched the ground. Working with the energy and enthusiasm of youth but with the occasional aches and pains of mature (oldish?) adults, we went to work....

Interview at least three realtor teams and, based upon the information gleaned, choose which team will work the hardest to sell our home. Check. Declutter, repair, and prepare the house for its debut exposure to none other than the ENTIRE WORLD, in person and on the Internet! Check. From the first Open House on, be prepared to live in a pared-down version of your normal lifestyle while reducing your life to its most simple and cleanliest form. Check. Be prepared to put up with a full range of emotions, from incredible lows to anticipatory highs and back down again. Can’t completely or sincerely Check that line item as being accomplished.

In any case, we have been blessed by the realtor gods. Coupled by the fact that we have loved and taken great care to maintain and improve upon our home over the years,
someone else has fallen in love and, from what we hear, would like to call it their home. 

NHIEU AND DAN AT THE HOLLYWOOD SALON

We survived their home inspection last Friday and spent the ‘away time’ wisely by getting hair cuts and a pedicure. We spent some tearful moments saying our good-byes to the friends we’d acquired in Nhieu Dao, our hairdresser who, for the past nine years, has had to learn so much about dealing with blonds in addition to his formal knowledge of exotic, dark-haired Vietnamese clients. And, Donna Tran, with whom I have entrusted my sad, often dry, and mostly tired feet to for over sixteen years when we first met at the Bonjour Salon in Winter Park just before our oldest daughter’s wedding.

MY FRIEND, DONNA, HAS TAUGHT
ME SO MUCH ABOUT VIETNAM, HER HOME.

This week we are packing-up for another drive up to Michigan, a jam-packed trailer in tow. This weekend we anticipate seeing high school friends (Class of ‘68), with less familiar faces now, at our Class Reunion in Three Rivers, Michigan! I won’t write how many years since graduation. You’re welcome to do the math and gulp along with me. I have to wonder what their perception of Dan and me will be. Does it even matter as long as we are all alive, healthy, and living our lives the best that we can?

LIEN AND DAN

LIEN (PRONOUNCED LYNN) HAS SHARED
SO MUCH AND GIVEN EVEN MORE. SO MANY
STORIES TO CHERISH AND WRITE ABOUT!

Then we fly home to Orlando to do the serious packing or ‘gutting of the house’ and labeling the contents in Sharpie black by virtue of its contents and where it should be placed in the little yellow cottage...or, rented storage unit.

Within the past seven weeks since my husband’s official retirement it’s been a virtual whirlwind of activity and emotions. He (we) hasn’t had time for anything close to resembling slowing down the pace of life, let alone being able to come up for a breath of fresh air every now and again. 

Some sage advice offered by this ‘Beautiful Grandma’ to all of the young people who, even with the world at their fingertips via smartphones and the Internet, still proclaim their utter boredom with life. I say to put on your running shoes and prepare to buckle-up for the fast-paced life ahead of you. Do your warm-ups, jockey for the best position while in the neutral zone, and get ready for the most competitive time of your life imaginable....retirement!

Oh, and did I happen to mention that you must be hungry for books and become an avid reader in order to be able to gobble-up as much knowledge as possible in your lifetime?

And, when you decide it’s time to face retirement, don’t be fooled by the allure of limiting your life to long walks on the beach, eating what you want, or sitting in a comfortable rocking chair all day long. Complete the book you began writing years ago, volunteer to help others even more now that you are not limited by employment or time constraints, and get involved in local politics by joining organizations that have everyone’s best interests and personal desires for a better life for all in mind. (Please promise that you will go out and vote this November!)

Cast out the misconception of allowing downtime dictate the rhythm of your life. Maybe you don’t have to continue a marathon pace after that Friday luncheon organized in your honor as Dan has, but knowing that you now have the time to ease into that personal change you’ve been looking forward to is an amazing feeling. Life itself is an intricate and beautiful thing; retirement helps you recognize the many facets of life you may have been missing out on all of these years.

So, put on your running shoes, boys and girls, because we all have a lot more than 26.2 miles left in us after we retire!!

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

COFFEEHOUSE CHATTER: FAMILY

 A series of essays....

THERE IS A MACHINE FOR EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE;
YOU JUST HAVE TO OPEN YOUR EYES AND FIND IT.

....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

From time to time, our neighborhood friends meet at the corner coffeehouse to relax, sip their favorite brew or concoction, and warm-up their hands and hearts...together!

Some might think of their meeting as a 'cleansing' or 'purification of the soul.' Even though they may share similar backgrounds and values, their ideas and opinions are as diverse and variable as the weather outside of the little shop. 

Let's grab a cup of our own, take a comfortable seat, sit back and listen to what today's chapter of 'Coffeehouse Chatter' has to offer....

Ben and Carl, high school buddies who have, recently, renewed their friendship after over forty years of living, sip their coffee while awaiting the arrival of their mutual friend and neighbor, Jack. Jack’s younger cousin, Tyler, makes a surprise entrance by accompanying his cousin to the corner coffeehouse this morning. This makes for some lively and interesting conversation. Let’s listen in....

BEN: So, Carl, how was your Father’s Day yesterday? Lots of love from your girls?

CARL: Aw, Ben...you know the deal. One daughter tries to be loving and caring and the other, well, I have no rational explanation for what goes on in her head these days!

BEN: Connie still giving you and Jill grief these days? This has been going on way too long, you know!

CARL: Since right around mid-January, soon after Jill and I went up to see our vacant land up north to try and generate some interest in its sale. With retirement this year and trying to sell our home down here, we need that piece of mountainside real estate to sell, ASAP! The money would surely come in handy right about now.

(Long pause....)

CARL: And, before you ask....no, we haven’t seen our precious grandkids since then, either. 

BEN: No Skype or FaceTime? Not even a phone call?

CARL: (Deep sadness spreads across his face) Nope. Didn’t hear from Connie or the kids on Father’s Day yesterday, either. Not a word. She wrote us in February and said she needed time away from us and that we were most of the problem behind her not feeling well lately. So, we are giving her space and hoping she is able to work out whatever’s wrong in her head and in her heart. What the hell, Ben....we live over 2,000 miles away from her and she sees us as her enemy?

BEN: Wow! (Eyes narrowed and forehead deeply expressive with multiple wrinkles)

CARL: We’re giving her as much time as needed. But, after asking her a million times what's wrong and receiving absolutely nothing in return in terms of any form of an answer....it’s been one of the most confusing and frustrating times in our lives. Jill and I can only sit back and wait for a reason and a sliver of light to shine through the darkness. Jill has even asked Connie’s mother-in-law to help us understand. She has never gotten back with us. If it wasn’t so damn heartbreaking and serious for us, I’d say it was almost like playing high school games with teenagers.

(Ben shakes his head in total disbelief and utter confusion. He looks up to see Jack wave at them from the front door as Jack points over at the short line at the counter.)

BEN: Well, Jack just walked in and I’m not sure who that is with him? Do you recognize him, Carl?

CARL: No, can’t say that I do. (Attempts to lift himself up out of the doldrums) Jack doesn’t have a younger brother, does he?

BEN: No, he’s an only child as far as I know. Listen, Carl...I would never dismiss your concerns about Connie and, you know that. Let’s talk about it again later, if it would help make you feel better. You know I can be a listening ear, right? I don’t like seeing you like this, man.

CARL: Sure. Thanks. 

(Jack and his younger companion join Ben and Carl at their corner table...large, steaming, white coffee cups in their hands)

BEN: (Standing) Hey, set those cups down, gentlemen, and have a seat! Well, Jack, introductions, please. 

(Spring sunlight shines in from the corner window and places all four men in its spotlight as they seat themselves at the cozy table)

JACK: I know. I know. I’m late, as usual. My cousin, Tyler, here just flew in from the West Coast last night and we’ve been reliving our younger, less complicated childhood days together this morning. It’s been quite therapeutic, actually.

(Ben and Carl take turns shaking Tyler’s hand and welcome him into the fold)

CARL: Man, you guys could have called off coffee with us this morning. We would have understood. (As Ben shakes his head up and down in unison)

TYLER: Nice meeting you guys! Skip my morning brew? Not a chance. My coffee is my morning courage, my wake-up juice, my main reason for crawling out of bed in the morning!! Well, you get the idea.... (A huge smile spreads across his handsome face) Besides, Jack has often spoken to me about you both and I was looking forward to meeting you guys.

JACK: Tyler has a new job position with Lockheed Martin over in Titusville. Just when we old fogies are wrapping it up on the job scene, this guy is still focusing on our future!

BEN: Tell us more, Tyler.

TYLER: Well, it’s kind of boring but, I began working for Lockheed Martin in Portland quite a few years ago and have been waiting for the right position to come along here at Lockheed Martin Space Systems Company on the coast. Yep, think of me as the Big Geek from Oregon. I’ll understand.

CARL: Interesting. Geeks are important elements of our society today....certainly not boring!

TYLER: With my background in engineering and love of space and uncovering the positive aspects that bode well for the future of mankind....I always knew that my new position would allow me to expand on all of the above. As one of their many slogans goes, “Lockheed Martin builds the technology that gets things done in space.” I always wanted to be a part of that team. Besides, living in Florida isn’t all that bad either!

JACK: That’s little Tyler in a nutshell. (He grins after taking a long sip of his cooling latte)

BEN: Married, Tyler? Any kids?

TYLER: Yep! Been married to the most beautiful and gracious woman for going on twenty years now. Children....well, no. We weren’t blessed with any of our own, unfortunately. With Claire’s job as a graphic artist keeping her busy, we’ve just allowed life to run its course. 

CARL: (He bears a kind yet quizzical look as he stares at Tyler) Brilliant! I have been introduced to my first bona fide rocket scientist after all these years living near the Space Coast of Florida. Are you over here looking for a new house by any chance, Tyler? 

TYLER: That’s certainly on my list of ‘To Do’s’ this trip, Carl. I wish Claire had been able to join me, though. Oh, well....glad she likes my taste, guys!! 

CARL: Maybe you wouldn’t mind a forty-five minute drive to Titusville because our home is available right now and not too far from Jack’s. Being on the east side of Orlando with the Beachline Expressway, the 528, right out our door, the commute wouldn’t be all that bad. 

JACK: I told him about your beautiful house this morning and we drove by it on the way over here. 

TYLER: I will have to check it out, Carl. It’s a nice place and having a pool sounds very inviting. Claire does have a pool on her ‘want list.’ And, living near my favorite cousin...

JACK: (Smiling) Only cousin!

TYLER: ...and his kids would be a huge bonus! Claire would enjoy learning about what the area has to offer with Lauren as her guide, Jack. Theme Parks, maybe. Best shopping malls, definitely! Come to think about it, this job change could be extra costly for me in the long run! 

(The small party of old friends and new finish their coffee and offer best wishes to Tyler for his new job and life experiences while shaking hands. Jack and Tyler say their good-byes and head toward the front door of the little coffeehouse after Tyler assures Carl he'll be giving his realtor a call, soon.)

BEN: (Gently places his hand on Carl’s arm) My friend....let’s get another cuppa joe for ourselves and sit and talk for a while longer. Well, you talk and I promise to listen. You, Jill, and your girls all mean the world to me and I can only imagine what you and Jill are going through right now.

CARL: Your friendship means a lot, Ben. Thanks for being here for me. Guys always want to think of themselves as macho and won’t allow themselves to show their vulnerable side. But, even we can be prone to the misery of Family relationships.

BEN: Serious stuff. (Pushing his open palm out towards his friend) Sit still. This one’s on me. I’ll be back with a steaming hot, jolt of courage in a few minutes and we’ll talk....

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

THE RAIN WILL DO THAT TO YOU: DRIFT FROM ONE THOUGHT TO ANOTHER, IN A MELANCHOLY MOOD

A series of essays.....

THE BOXES MAY BE GROWING INTO A FORT-LIKE FACADE....
YET, AS I LOOK AROUND, NOTHING SEEMS TO BE DEPLETED!
 

.....as seen through my eyes!





By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

Gloomy daytime showers persist outside the sliding glass doors on this saturated weekday morning. Hundreds of gentle reminders of our past and present life remain haphazardly scattered around the house we’ve called home for two decades. Lurking are the mementos, reminders of a large chapter in this Book of Life that has taken two people through so many years of love, laughter, tears, and joy. 

Occasionally, this particular dish (chapter) has been spiced-up with certain trials and tribulations designed to perplex the main dining guests as much as possible. If you know me at all, it would be like realizing that the chef has put way too much garlic into the recipe and is waiting around to see if I relish it or choke after the first bite. Cruel, so cruel.

While my husband spent the weekend working outside on his list of things that we’ve ignored for far too long, I was indoors constructing a cardboard fort in the family room. Each carefully filled rectangle or square rising higher and higher in the room, blue ink scribbles indicating content and future placement of each tan building block at our new home! My humble attempt at being as organized as possible throughout this process.

RAINDROPS POUND THE POOL DECK WITH
THEIR STEADY RHYTHM FOR HOURS AND HOURS

Rumble, rumble....lightening and thunder have recently joined ranks with the consistent rainfall outside. Gradually, the swimming pool fills and nearly exceeds its liquid capacity. Malnourished appearing squirrels (typical looking Florida squirrels) race across the top of the screen enclosure sending torrents of rainwater down into the pool and simulate the sound of erratic gunshots as the fluid stalactites fall sharply into the standing water, harmonizing with the constant rumblings in the atmosphere above.

I fell off of the white, kitchen step stool Saturday afternoon. Can you hear a tree fall in the forest? Well, you can if you happen to be that tree! It was painful and quite a shock to my system. Dan was outside mowing the small square of lawn we call our ‘greenspace’ in the backyard, north of the pool. He wasn’t there to help pick me up. Unusual. Once I determined that the left wrist wasn’t broken, my heart stopped racing like an Indy car in May. I forgot I was on the second step and tumbled backwards; my left side abruptly merging with the little, brown ottoman. The three board games and box of loose dominoes I was extracting from the cupboard came cascading down around me in slow motion.  Left side sore but not enough to deter me from the task at hand. Feeling very fortunate...

We keep telling one another how lucky we are. We could have a basement in this house and we do not. Unless you can build on the side of a hill and create a walk-out, not many Floridian homes have what people up north call basements or cellars. If we did...it would be full of stuff, too. Instead we have a small storage area in the garage attic space. The last time I looked, it was filled to the brim.

Boxes, packing supplies, and memories are in abundance within these four stuccoed walls as we get painfully serious about this inevitable move. The most difficult part for me has been extracting personal items from each room. Familiar shapes linger in the fine dust where family photos, hockey pucks and figurines, and golfing trophies once resided on shelves. Note To Self: Dust! Vague outlines of picture frame backs that have brushed the painted walls for years must be wiped off, covered up, or repainted. The culprits, with their handsome grins and smart looking clothes, are gently bubble wrapped, boxed, and added to the fort’s growing facade.

Taking a break from all of this tomorrow. I have a dentist appointment at one o’clock that will break my day into two parts. Soon, within a few days, I will be meeting Lea, a long, lost friend, to enjoy lunch and conversation together in Cocoa Village. She is such an amazing lady with so much energy and panache. When I grow-up, I would like to be just like Lea.

"HURT YOUR EYES ORANGE!"

I’m cutting bubble wrap that is as bright orange as the company’s own logo. Seriously, hurt your eyes orange! I assume they don’t want you to become complacent within your humble surroundings while wrapping up all of your precious memories!

The intricately cut, Waterford crystal vase Dan gave to me on our twenty-fifth Wedding Anniversary is quite bedazzling wrapped in its orange, Michelin-like coat. Stay safe, memories. 

Dan officially retires, after a lifetime in the building and construction industry, on June 1, 2018. I have yet to look...is it on a Monday, a Friday? I’m sure it will be a Friday. In this industry, you tend to work for so many different companies throughout your career. Dan is no exception. Roger B. Kennedy, Inc., his latest employer, will take him out to lunch and wish him a grand life in retirement. They mean well. They didn’t know Dan through the formal years of accumulative knowledge that was built on year after year, one job site after another. But, they did reap the benefits of his esteemed knowledge (the cream on the top) these past few years. The way I look at it, Roger B. Kennedy was the truly lucky one in this case.

DAN VISITING ONE OF HIS JOBS
LOCATED IN ORLANDO

I will never take all that you have done for us as a family for granted, Dear Heart; through the good times and the, well, not so good times, too. Someday I will have to write about your bravery and tenacity. It will be an interesting story!

I can tell you this, if I do have ‘memory’ in my genetic material, it must be in the form of instinct that travels far back into my European ancestry. Looking out at the pouring rain makes me feel that I’ve been here many times before. The women in my past have all felt the way I do, nomadic and vulnerable...with raindrops representing our tears, and the knowledge that breaking down one ‘nest’ only represents having to build another. And, my inherent behavior isn’t necessarily dependent upon experience and yet, somehow, a certain presence fulfills my basic need to be happy, loved, and feel whole and appreciated.

Together, we will (and have) survived just about anything; with or without the blessing of our own children. 

Let the Floridian rain pour down and, with its cleansing powers, wash over us as we create change and, hopefully, conquer any pitfalls along our journey. Get us through the next few months of dependency upon others and trust in the system and help us sell our house here with minimum negativity. ***My little prayer to St. Joseph these days. 

Another deprived looking squirrel hammers along the top screens of the pool enclosure sending large sprays of water in every direction. My thoughts turn back to the job at hand and another vase is wrapped and tucked away deep into the packing paper lined box.

IT WILL NEVER BE A 'ROCKING CHAIR'
FOR US. I WILL SETTLE FOR A COMFORTABLE
SEAT SURROUNDED BY LOTS OF LOVE!

Chuckling, I think about a specific mantra I created many years ago after moving to Orlando. “Nothing ever dies here; it just comes back to life all on its own, eventually!” Naturally, I was thinking about the flowers, shrubs, and trees. That which withers and turns brown will and does return to a green, healthy state down here! But, I often wonder if it applies to humans, as well. Curiously, this could be why so many retirees move here. Oh, they say it’s all about the sun filled, blue skied days. Maybe we can take some of this Florida Magic up north with us. After being constantly exposed to it for over twenty odd years, it may have become ‘memory’ within my genetic material by now!

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

MOVING 'TWENTY YEARS' UP NORTH

A series of essays.....

HOMEOWNERS IN ORLANDO

.....as seen through my eyes!



By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

Prior to moving down to Orlando, my husband had to put up with a mad person. 

“People don’t travel down to Florida to live,” is how I would counter his attempts at reasonability. “People travel down there to vacation, right?” We’d, actually, been doing just that for almost twenty-five years with our two, young daughters while we owned a week’s timeshare condominium on Sanibel Island, Florida.

After much kicking and screaming, and abject resistance on my part, and old fashioned wooing on his, I conceded after nearly a year. Our youngest, was just entering her freshman year at Michigan State University and I was bound and determined not to abandon her at this critical time in her life. Also, I was enjoying my job and was hard-pressed to leave it, our daughter, or the state that I had called home for so many years.

The ‘magical’ part (pun intended) was that our oldest daughter had secured a job with Walt Disney World after graduating from MSU and was just beginning a ten-year-long career with the company. Having her near helped me through the depression I’d been feeling about having to relocate.

And so, this journey to the City Beautiful (Orlando’s nickname), Theme Park Alley, and more people from all over the world than you could possibly imagine in one small space, began. It was nineteen hundred and ninety-seven when my husband drove down to begin his new job as Project Manager with Picerne Development. Our oldest daughter followed him down after accepting an Internship with Walt Disney World. I was, happily, up North trying to figure out how it happened to be that I was, suddenly, living all alone with family scattered here and there. And, then....it was time to move and join Dan in Orlando!

Moving itself was a no-brainer. The company moved everything we’d been collecting as a family for over thirty years and we had it divided between our new apartment and an air conditioned storage unit until we had a plan formulated as to where and when we moved into our own home. “Got to learn the lay of the land first,” I would say. “I have no clue which area of this sprawling city I want to live in! And, not knowing a single person down here to help fill us in, this is going to take some time.” Dan did agree with this.

Even as depressed as I was about having to change my life so completely, as well as leaving our youngest in college up in East Lansing, I knew that, eventually, I needed to find a job. The simple act of employment really turned things around. My concentration was not centered around ‘poor me’ anymore; it was about working once again, being with other people, and saving money for our new home. For the first time in many months I felt totally alive!

Two years in and with steady weekly deposits into our savings account, we were ready to take the piano out of storage and become homeowners in Orlando!

As our oldest daughter spread her wings and climbed the corporate ladder, we had two years to figure out where we were going to plant our Floridian roots and chose to build our ‘forever’ home on the East side of the city with convenient highway access to anything and everything of importance to us. 

Every night for four months, we would meet at our construction site to see the progress on our new home: “Perfect timing. Thought you were going to be late,” I chided. “You’re the one who had to drive all the way from Celebration to get here. That’s almost forty-five minutes across town on the 417! Let’s go see how much they accomplished in there today,” he said. How excited we were, and to think that building on our dreams within those four, cement block walls (eventually, to be covered in stucco) with the plumbing pipes sticking out of the cement slab on the ground....I felt I was going to be living on the other side of the moon! Pipes were supposed to be stuck somewhere between the wall studs or in the ceiling! And, not being able to have a basement was culture shock for me. 

Our oldest daughter met her future husband here. They were married on the west side of Orlando and gave us two of the most beautiful and brilliant grandchildren here. Having decided to follow an alternate career, however, they moved to Michigan and now thrive not far from where her sister resides. Our youngest, found the ‘love of her life’ in Michigan, married him and produced three adorable and accomplished children......including twins! And, then there were ‘five’ of the most precious reasons to ever reconsider making grand changes in our lives.

Dan retires this year. The pulse of life ebbs and flows with the tides that pull at the vast seas surrounding this semi-tropical peninsula we call home. Changes are coming along the horizon and we either accept them gracefully or remain basking in the Floridian sunshine forever, our family far away in Michigan.

A typical conversation would have gone something like this:

“Did you know this is the longest we’ve been in one home together throughout our married life? We’ve been down here for over twenty years, worked and played hard, and created a ton of memories,” Dan said, continuing the running theme of our Saturday morning coffee-fest while lounging in the room we, lovingly, call our library. 

“I do,” I replied. “But, my question is, haven’t we done all this the opposite way around? Don’t most people retire and then move down here to relax and live? I feel like we’ve been on a perpetual vacation all of this time. I kind of like it, Dan. I don’t know if I can take the Michigan weather anymore.”

“We’ve been very fortunate. But, I think life itself is calling us back up there with all of the kids. Hey, I remember having to convince you that moving down here was a good thing to do. You hated me for pulling you away from up there!”

“My heart was there, Dan. Our ‘baby’ was still there and I felt numb and disoriented when I knew it was time to commit to the disruption of our family by leaving her and making a life down here. 

Looking me square in the eyes, he asked, “Can you make that same commitment to our grandchildren now? Will you pull the ties that bind us here gently apart and help me create a new life surrounded by the people we love?”

“I can do that.” I paused, thinking for a moment. “Do you remember that mad, depressed woman you had to convince that Orlando could be a great place to call home? For nearly a year I would fly down to visit and you’d take me to plays, soft jazz concerts at Leu Gardens Park, with long, sunny drives down the Florida A1A where we’d make stops to walk the beach hand-in-hand and end up hauling tons of sand back into the car before making the trip back to your apartment? I want to feel that warmth again; always keep it alive in my heart.”

“I remember you kicking and screaming all the way down here! You weren’t very happy for quite some time, as I remember.”

“You dropped me in the middle of a fire pit and then flew off to West Virginia and Mississippi for the week for work! Orlando was in a dry spell and fires were flaring up all over the outskirts of the city,” I said, clutching a pillow to my chest as I recalled those frightening, early days.

“I know. You told me it was like I’d left you in the bowels of hell when I flew off to work every Monday.”

“If it hadn’t been for Ali being so close, I would have gone completely crazy! Our daughter helped me keep some semblance of sanity. Then we built this beautiful house together and I, finally, got the chance to decorate a home just the way I wanted to after all these years.”

Smiling at me, “It’s difficult to change. It’s hard to just let go of so many years of memories, isn’t it?”

“Yes. And because of that, you now have another crazy, mad woman on your hands! Only, this time, I’m kicking and screaming in the opposite direction...because, and don’t tell me otherwise, we both feel that Orlando is now our home in so many ways.”

“I agree, wholeheartedly, but after retiring, there isn’t a good enough reason for us not to be up North with all of the kids, my brothers and their families, and all of our good friends. Our lives will be full. Our lives will be complete and we’ll have, definitely, come full circle.”

“You’re right,” I said. “Of course, you are. What I need to do is get over the huge hurdle of retirement, selling this home, and dealing with the intricacies of packing up twenty years of memories. Twenty years of happiness.“

“Yes? And......?” he inquired with a quizzical looking grin on his handsome face.

“If I believe enough in ‘us’ and understand that being a family once again is our highest priority....then, and only then, will it be easy for me to fill up boxes and bins with all of our amazing Florida memories and begin moving ‘twenty years’ of our lives up North.”

“At the end of all our hard work will be the ultimate prize,” he explained. “Those five shining faces accompanied by a million kisses and hugs will surely warm us both up every day of the year!”

“I know. Their love for us and our love for them will always be far greater and much more meaningful than having the Floridian sun shining down like every day is a golden summer’s day. Hey, I love you, too, Papa! Let's get some boxes and I'll start packing some books...."

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

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