SEEING THE LIGHT: KEEPING A PROMISE TO MYSELF

A series of essays.....

LIGHT SHOT THROUGH CUT GLASS CRYSTAL
~MORNING LIGHT SHINES THROUGH OUR
WATERFORD VASE IN THE FOYER~

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

Just as light reflection shot through perfectly cut glass crystals bring out the best ‘sparkle’ and can be so luxuriously pleasing to the human eye, keeping promises made to yourself from the deepest depths of your being can make you shine like the brightest star in the heavens. 

I am shining on both the inside and outside these days because I have kept a promise to myself for over a year now and I will not waiver from it until the outcome I hope to see has been, undeniably, achieved.

Before I explain the promise I made to myself, please allow me to set the stage by taking a moment to run by only a few things that are happening in our world today:

The worst flu epidemic to happen in years.

The annihilation of the Republican Party by the most incompetent leader of the Free World.

Weather patterns above and beyond what has been considered ‘normal.’

The Women’s March growing by leaps and bounds after chalking-up its 2nd year!

Sadly, gun violence and mass shootings becoming the norm within our social make-up.

Many of us, for the second time, living through the threat and fear of a nuclear holocaust.

Puerto Rican school children cheering for ‘the light’ after four months of living in the darkness without power.

Acknowledging that equal rights for all has yet to be achieved. Will that day be in my lifetime?

The financial and social status of one percent of the population is actively attempting to obliterate the rest of our nation’s population including the elderly, the weak, the poor, as well as annihilate the structure of the middle class. Attempting to take away our Social Security Benefits, health insurance, our right to clean air and water, and ignoring scientific facts and findings regarding global warming.

The cruel and unnecessary plight of the Dreamers and DACA recipients. 

I could go on and on and on with this list. It drags me down to think that in 2018 our country is not progressing as it should, but instead we are retreating into the past; a past that this present administration considers to be Making America Great Again. With the power of a dictatorship such as the likes in Russia today, their dictator, Vladimir Putin, has been directing and controlling this current president like his own personal marionette in order to attempt to break apart what the United States has always stood for: Democracy! Freedom! Individual Rights! And, the right to speak openly and freely without fear or recrimination! All the while the words ringing in our ears straight from the poetic pen of Emma Lazarus: “Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”

Do you recall ever having read a novel that described the perpetrator getting away with what might be considered ‘the perfect crime?’ As you read along with the storyline you begin to realize that many factors are involved in the apparent success of this intricate plot to rob, murder, or discriminate against another human being or institution. The talented author expertly weaves the various contributing factors into the plot denoting apparent perfection by pointing out fastidious planning, behind the scenes backing (including Big Money), perfect timing, and hitting the mark when people and situations appear to be at their most vulnerable.

Certainly, timing was everything for this foreign dictator as he plotted and planned out one of the greatest takeovers of Democracy today, concentrating heavily within the United States but encompassing Western Europe, as well. 

He needed the perfect pawn available and found him in Trump. With Trump’s propensity for greed, the manipulation of others, and desire to be looked upon as powerful and brilliant....the task of buttering him up was minimal. Trump was ripe for the taking. The vendetta he holds against the goodness and intelligence shown by Barack Obama is obscenely apparent throughout his ‘Birther Movement,’ as well as the simple fact that Barack’s strengths and popularity have galled Trump for years. Having the opportunity to retaliate against the 44th President was the cheese set out as bait in the Putin rat trap. 

Dividing the main principals of the people of any country through the means of fear and hatred weakens its chances of being strong from within; making it highly vulnerable to any outside influence. The last few years of extreme police brutality and massive gun violence with obvious disrespect for human life, has been breaking down the existence of law and order and weakening the fine line between good cop/bad cop, right and wrong, and enhancing a ‘gestapo-like’ influence of free-for-all Wild West brutality. This, unfortunately, is evidenced in the increasing power and brutality used by ICE (U.S. Immigration & Customs Enforcement) officers, Border Patrol police, and White Supremacist groups that believe in a political, economic, and cultural system in which whites overwhelmingly control power.... 

And why not? They’ve been given a free, anything goes, pass by their great leader, Trump, who has displayed his indiscriminate tendencies of racial profiling and hatred for many years. 

THESE STATS ARE DATED AS OF YESTERDAY,
JANUARY 24, 2018, AND INCLUDES DEATH, INJURIES,
AND NUMBER OF INCIDENTS REPORTED AND
VERIFIED  ~ THIS NUMBER CHANGES
DRASTICALLY EACH DAY AND
DOES NOT INCLUDE SUICIDES!

Looking at the chart above, you have to realize that we are only in the third week of this brand new year. 

Couple this attitude with the powerful backing of the NRA (National Rifle Association) and you have a steaming shit cocktail that’s guaranteed to disrupt and change all previous rules of law, order, and civility. By circulating its power throughout the various organizations who are paid to protect us, not brutalize us, and giving the 'green light' to the hate mongers, monsters are created and existing miscreants thrive. Special Counsel, Robert Mueller, understood early on that following the ‘money trail’ would shed the most light on understanding the motives behind the Trump administration and its connection to Russia, Big Money, and Power!

What on earth sparked this colossal revelation of mine today in the first place, with this day being just one more in the continuing clown show we call our government?! It feels bazaar sitting here gazing up at the vertiginous sky, mind wandering around in circles like a child lost in the middle of Time Square. Honestly, it was the simple act of remembering why I have not changed my Facebook profile picture in slightly over a year.... And, firmly vowing not to do so as long as we have these selfish, demoralizing people in the White House. When he and all of the similar ilk around him are formally expelled for many or all of the reasons I spoke about above...It will be a pleasure and a blessing to remove this badge of courage and exchange it for one filled with beauty and love (pictures with my grandchildren); vendetta having been recognized and, ultimately, rectified.

Already we see an upsurge in the number of women running for elected office from city mayors to Congresspersons, Senators, and Governors of the states they live in and will be proud to represent in Washington, D.C.  And, as long as that glass ceiling remains, virtually, intact, the sky is the limit for each and every one of them. 

My heart swells with the knowledge that many men regard female strength with such openness and anticipation, as if they have known for years that the simple act of injecting fresh, new ideas into the positions formerly held by (old/white) men would spark a major effort towards change, fill the cracks with a bit of softness, and allocate plenty of determination and new vibrations throughout the land. Bless all of you fine gentlemen! Gratefully, I know quite a few of you.

In my firm belief that Women Can Stop Trump, this symbol will remain right where it is as my profile picture, proudly displaying my innermost feelings while representing my steadfast belief in the power of women all over the world! The day it is removed and changed will be a day of celebration acknowledging the calculated progress into the future of our Democracy!

Author’s Note: It is better to enjoy life than to let it eat you up. So, I will celebrate life by believing that the truth will overcome. In honor of life (and speaking the truth), we are off to see and listen to Vice President Joe Biden next Monday, January 29, at the Dr. Phillips Center For The Performing Arts in downtown Orlando! Embrace the moment! 

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

CHANCES ARE.....

A series of essays.....

THE STATE THEATER ON SOUTH MICHIGAN STREET,
SOUTH BEND, INDIANA

Photo Courtesy The South Bend Tribune Archives



.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

My dear Mother couldn’t drive a car when we were growing-up. Whatever her lack of motivation was, fear of the unknown or generational apathy, we were, pretty much, transportation deprived and depended upon bicycles and our own two feet more often than not. Since Dad was on-the-road for work most weekdays, there wasn’t even a car in the garage for Mom to use if she had to. Public transportation often became our modus operandi and that’s just how we rolled!

As children, we became quite dependent upon Mom’s ability to take advantage of public transportation. Fortunately, we lived in large enough towns that offered convenient city bus service, electric cable cars 🚎 (when I was a small girl in the early 1950's), and even a train, the South Shore Line, that could take us into Chicago for the day and then back home again that evening.

CABLE CAR IN DOWNTOWN
SOUTH BEND, INDIANA ~ CIRCA 1940'S

INTRODUCTION OF THE NEW STREAMLINE
CITY BUS IN JANUARY OF 1960

Upon these excursions into the city to buy school clothes, go Christmas shopping, and have lunch with Mom, we were given extensive rules and regulations to follow to the last letter. Basically, being a single Mom for most of the week, she never lost sight of the fact that gathering and keeping her small children close by her was of paramount importance towards the success of these outings. For the most part, we complied.

Chances are, you recall being a young child, seemingly left to your own devices while traversing the children’s department of, let's say, the downtown Wolf & Dessauers in Fort Wayne, or Robertson’s Department Store in South Bend, Indiana. If we were lucky and Mom could afford to splurge, we found ourselves having lunch at Robertson’s Tearoom and Luncheonette between shopping events. And, when we were very, very good, chances were we’d take-in a matinee at the Colfax theater or the State theater 🎭 on S. Michigan Street. 

FIRST FLOOR OF ROBERTSON'S
DEPARTMENT STORE. ~ 1963

Photo/Tribune Archives

Believing we were left to our own devices had its unpleasant consequences that, generally, broke any positive mood Mom may have been luxuriating in during our day downtown together. I seem to recall one of these examples and was always reminded of it when I would take my own young children shopping with me many years later. 

It left me cold and disoriented at the vulnerable age of two or three when I lost my Mother for what seemed like...forever! I was a good kid and I tried to listen to my parents to the best of my ability. But, sometimes, even the best intentions go awry when you are so young and don’t understand why certain limitations are placed upon you. What evil lurks beyond sight of the hem of her brown, tweed coat and the sound of the familiar shuffle of the black pump shoes that carried her across the white marble floors? Life, at that time, seemed so settled, safe, and warm. 

As in the pacification of a crying infant, my stifled sobs were soon appeased by the unfamiliar face of a store clerk who had heard unusual sounds coming from the closed cupboard below her cash register; a cupboard meant to store hangers, paper shopping bags with brown, twine handles and the store’s logo emblazoned across their front. And, obviously, wayward little girls who had lost their Mothers while playing hide-and-seek among the racks of hanging clothes on the congested floor of the children’s department. 

LOOKING AT A CHRISTMAS DISPLAY IN A
WINDOW OF WOLF & DESSAUERS
IN FORT WAYNE, INDIANA ~ CIRCA 1950'S

Photo Courtesy wboi.org

Little did I know that a full-blown APB had been issued by my Mother minutes beforehand. During those few moments of time, coupled with the fact that I was having a grand time dancing 💃 with the pink and blue snowsuits hanging down from their little white, plastic hangers one aisle over, all sorts of crazy, evil scenarios entered Mom’s mind like sticking points in a Truman Capote novel. You see, as I sat in the comforting darkness I’d placed myself in....if only to avoid the pain of loss and disorientation, my sobs obscured the calls of my name as my poor Mother and the nice ‘store lady,’ tortoise shell eyeglasses dangling from a silver chain around her neck, frantically looked for me. 

At this point, I’m pretty sure my older brother was taking it all in from his cozy perspective while sitting on a chair situated near the dressing rooms not too far away. After all, poor Mom couldn’t afford to lose both of us and proceeded to anchor him down with her heavy coat and purse, and any packages she may have been carrying at the time of my disappearance along with the explicit instructions to stay put!

Even though I was oblivious to what evils might be lurking around us in the form of child snatching or human trafficking, my Mother was not. The pure relief on her beautiful face was more than obvious to me as she reached down into the dark cupboard only to whisk me up and into her protective arms....her tears saturating the shoulder of my little, navy blue coat. I didn’t believe my chubby, little arms could ever squeeze her neck as tightly as they did but my vice grip mirrored her own and we remained that way for quite some time.

Mother was a wise woman. She did not waste her breath on scolding me. Her intention was not to place the fear of God in me in the form of my Father’s wrath by saying, “Wait until I tell your Dad about this!” No, nothing like that. Chances are she truly wanted to, if only to relieve her own distress. My Mother knew that we had both experienced a valuable lesson that day. I would never again lose sight of my Mother in public places if only out of fear of being in dark spaces with hangers stabbing me in the side. And, Mother renewed her understanding of how precious the gift of life was in the form of her own flesh and blood. To even imagine losing that life was unthinkable, unbearable for her. 

Thinking back, we may still have had lunch in Robertson’s Tea Room and Luncheonette....after Mom dug my brother, Ronnie, out from under his weighty coverings in the chrome-armed chair and she dabbed at the tears on our faces with soft, white tissues smelling of her cologne after having lived in her purse for a while. 

ROBERTSON'S DEPARTMENT STORE
TEA ROOM AND LUNCHEONETTE

Photo Courtesy South Bend Tribune Archives

Now, you and I both know that my Father heard about my infantile misadventures not long after he arrived home from his long work week. I still don’t know if Mom told him the entire story or not. But, what I do believe is that chances are my older brother had something to do with passing along this information to him soon after he entered the back door. But, by that time, it didn’t matter. I already knew how much I was wanted. All I had to do was picture my dear Mother’s face in my mind and....I knew how much I was loved. Her generous spirit is alive and well in my heart to this very day!

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

TAKE A MOMENT TO ASK YOURSELF WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE BORED!

A series of essays.....

OPENING UP TO A WHOLE NEW WORLD OF POSSIBILITIES ~~~

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

If our life always felt settled, safe, and warm, as it may have, at some point, back in our youth, then our world would be extremely small, exceptionally limited, and notoriously boring! Fortunately, for many of us, life is anything but boring.

I chuckle to myself as I use the ‘b’ word in conjunction with my thoughts because it tends to be such a harmless and childlike word describing a time when, for several ‘odd’ moments of its waking hours, the youthful mind plays with the art of meditation; it filters out the rest of the world and becomes, blissfully, blank. Being bored is the filler, the chinking between the stacked logs of a less finished structure, that cushions the gap between simply being an innocent child instinctively living for the sake of having fun and trying to make sense of the world that is yet to come.

As young adults, and having lapped that classic, red Radio Flyer many times over, the childhood loop of boredom gives way to new responsibilities with more mature scenarios, making way for higher education, employment, and even the art of falling in love 😍. Work patterns emerge, whether we work from home, an office or cubicle, or out of our own vehicle, we work to get paid in order to pay our bills, raise a family, pay off student loans, play hard....and, eventually, retire with grace and dignity. During this particular phase of life, we can only dream about being bored!

Quite often, mankind meets with obstacles that are unpredictable and life changing. 

Some of us may be struggling with ill health ourselves or, dealing with the illness of a loved one or friend. Naturally, at this point, our focus would be on rectifying this position by any means possible......and, this alone can take up most of our time and energy. This may not be the challenge we had always hoped for in our lives, however, it would be one we must acknowledge, attempt to understand, but never allow losing the fight to be an option. And, if compromise is the ultimate balance negotiator, its important to allow the light to stream in from the tiny cracks that have, inevitably, formed on the exterior and allow it to fill our heart and being with its warmth, its strength, and its love.

If being an adult takes on the responsibilities of life including listening to others, filtering out  good from evil, caring for the health and well-being of those around you, making mature decisions that will help create a healthier, more wholesome world to live in....many adults today have missed the boat on this one. Sadly, this includes a large percentage of the people we’ve elected to govern us in Washington D.C. 

No, I am not taking that course right now. I’m feeling way too good to be pulling myself down into that deep abyss, heaving swamp of depression, deep ocean of lost dreams and acute selfishness, only to find myself adrift upon a sea of uncertainty. Not today!

This morning I’m feeling too good for that because a few nights ago we pushed the ‘ENTER’ button and signed-up for an excursion into two exciting worlds, one yet unknown, Scotland, and the other a continuance of what has proven to be a place we are highly attracted to for many amazing reasons, Ireland. Normally, I am apprehensive about committing so much effort and money into securing airfare for a future trip. (Many of us know how the Internet has made this exceedingly simple to do.) But, not this time. 

My gut tells me this is the right thing to do and this trip promises to be the cherry-on-top of a very busy and eventful year for the two of us. As many of you may know, not only are we remodeling our home in Michigan, but we’re executing a major overhaul of our home here in Orlando with the idea of readying it for resale within the next few months. Timing is everything considering Dan is set to retire in August and it would be nice to have one house 🏡 ready to move into and the other conveniently sold and out of sight and mind. 

Hopefully, we will have sold our property located in North Carolina, as well. Believe me, fingers and toes are crossed with solemn prayers to Saint Joseph said each day for good measure with this one. Survival is having to amputate old dreams yet be strong enough to staunch the flow of life’s blood in order to insure that life can move on. (We’re still having to work a bit on this.)

Moving from one place to another is often grounds for heartache and headaches; having over two thousand miles between the two could turn it into a full-blown migraine in the months to come. We will not be having a company move us back up to Michigan as we did over twenty years ago when we moved down to Orlando from Michigan to follow Dan’s employment opportunities.

I wake each day categorizing our ‘stuff’ and asking myself where this piece might find a new home in our little yellow cottage. Or, explaining to myself the reasons why there’s no way this table will ever fit up there! And, sadly, this third item will just have to be included in our community garage sale in May. Since I like to refurbish things and charm new life into them, many pieces will fit nicely into our new world even if they must be stored for a short time before the new addition is completed on the cottage. 

All of the roads leading us into the immediate future guide us toward a monumental celebration in September; the pièce de résistance, if you will: Travel! While utilizing our purest and most unselfish minds, and sharing an ideology developed and skillfully honed via our personalities coupled with those of our good friends of like philosophy and world views, I predict that this trip is going to be a blast!

 Even though we may be semi-settled, if only in our minds, and safe and warm for the time being, there’s a lot of change happening and each day that goes by reflects upon this fact. Decisions have to be made immediately. There’s no more putting things off until next year because ‘next year’ is here today. It’s time to pull-on our ‘Big Person’ pants 👖 and be open-minded and strong throughout the process, never forgetting to listen to one another along the way. This will help make life considerably easier for both Dan and myself.

So, with all of this to look forward to, for better or for worse, whichever the case may be, there’s one last thing I can think of to say as this year swiftly progresses with each breath I take.....The word ‘boring’ certainly has no room in our lives this year! 2018 promises to be a busy one but, with the added incentive of traveling to Scotland and Ireland dangling like a juicy carrot right before our eyes, we should be just fine.

LIFE IS AN ADVENTURE.....ENJOY EACH MOMENT!

Courtesy: IrishCentral.com

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

A PHOTOGRAPHER'S NOTES: PAST TO PRESENT

A series of essays and poems.....

THE PINKS AND PURPLE MISTS OF THE SMOKY MOUNTAINS
~A HISTORY OF BEAUTY, WAR, INDIGENOUS AMERICANS AND HARD WORK~

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

With blades of grass and stone, alike, immortally drenched in cold rain and blood,

The history that surrounds this dampened paradise attracts the brave and the bold.

Can you feel the past running through your lug-bottom soles as you walk each path and trail? And, weapon of choice strapped ‘round your neck waiting to capture and behold,

Each footstep marked in crooks and crannies...marching, marching without fail.

THIS BEAUTIFUL BARN LIVES
BETWEEN MAGGIE VALLEY
AND IRON DUFF, NORTH CAROLINA

Dilapidated barn just around the bend, if only you could talk to me this sunny day; 

I know what you might say to this wayward traveler so keen on capturing your image.

“Cling righteously to what’s transpired, before my hat of rusty tin and swayback walls near collapse. Lambs and calves were born and sheltered within my bosom before the stink of automobile exhaust, acid rain, and time contributed to my inevitable demise.”

WERE THE MOUNTAINS A SOURCE OF
JOY OR OBSTACLES OF SORROW AND PAIN?

As hard work’s sweat soaked through clothes and bloodied hands gripped the plow,

These men and women, born of guts and glory, raised offspring that endured hard times;

Knew the true meaning of survival as they faced every challenge known to mankind.

Were the encircling mountains a blessing or a curse as Sunday’s bells began to chime;

Truly massive hurdles that bone-weary bodies translated into obstacles so unkind?

GROUNDS AROUND THE
BILTMORE ESTATE

VIVID GREENS OF
CHRISTMAS HOLLY

Somehow, we often remember you in cold, gray tones of fine-grained plates of slate,

With each image bearing the bitter smell of the photographer’s flash powder light.

Have the bright and vivid colors of Indigenous Americans blended with your own,

Even after the Cherokee tribes, forced to leave, began to shed their Trail of Tears?

Sadly, ten years later, Congress grants them money used to purchase their own land.

Today we delight in all your glory, from trees of burnt sienna to fields in every shade of green. And, purple misted mountains slowly blackening in the fading light of the setting sun! You grace us with your ‘pure light’ from early morning hours into the magenta and blue nights. We drive long distances to see you; envying those who already call you home. Western North Carolina, an illuminated gemstone that fills me with eternal joy!

THE BEAUTY OF WESTERN NORTH CAROLINA

Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved

Photo Copyright © 2018 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved