MOVING ON.....2024

A Note From The Author: Jacqueline E. Hughes

I am so happy to welcome in the new year, 2024!!! My Blog is changing-up a bit....mainly because I am evolving. Travel will always take precedence in my life and, my journeys will be shared with you. This 2024 version will offer a variety of new stories and personal ideas, as well. This is all about having fun and enjoying this Beautiful Journey called......Life!!!

Showing posts with label Loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Loss. Show all posts

Thursday, December 8, 2016

ANOTHER BRIGHT STAR ~ TOO SOON!



A series of essays.....



~~TAKE REFUGE IN THE COZINESS OF THE 'STARRY NIGHT'~~
    Courtesy of The Imaginative Conservative



.....as seen through my eyes!




By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

Look up to the night sky tonight and you will clearly see another bright star shining down upon us.These stars are very special, you understand, because they represent the Mothers, Daughters, Sisters, Wives, Aunts, and members of the Sisterhood who have left our earthly company, with many having departed far too soon! 


Take refuge in the coziness of the night sky, my Sister!
Nestle in amongst the brave who have flown before you,
For, your time is now.


Certainly, God created the stars above to offer all of us hope; to shower those left behind in the brilliance of star beams and majestic twinkles so that we will never have to feel alone. 

Women comprise the earthly community of caregivers who, like an unrelenting firestorm, swiftly sweep through their domain rarely swerving in their determination to do what is best for everyone around them. They are mother to their own offspring, nourishing and protecting, while extending these magnanimous gifts to all children and anyone in need of a generous spirit or a masterful portion of dignity of the soul. This combination of qualities enables a woman to handle trouble with firmness (protect), disdain injustice, and be loyal and trustworthy under all circumstances.


Remain vigilant and firm in the hereafter, dear Sister!
Believe that your roots continue to grow strong and sound and that
Memory serves the soul of those left behind.


This is why those of us left here on Earth without you, Mother, mistrust our own emotions, doubt ourselves, and challenge the ability to cope with your loss. 

Heartbreak is having a Mother leave too soon.....sixty-two years of age....with so many young grandchildren left to wonder and ask the adults, "Why?" Answers forthcoming. And I, being her only daughter, her proud new friend, was filtering grief under a starlit Chicago sky while holding the hands of my own two young daughters; husband cautiously engaged in support and love. Really....what is the 'perfect' combination of words you might offer someone who has just lost a parent, her Mother, confidant, friend? A veneer of 'protective numbness' encased my being on that long, somber drive back to Michigan that night....under those same brilliant stars that showered their heavenly light, guiding us along that stretch of the I-94 highway.


Oh, night sky starred with bright earthly flowers,
I transfix on one special bloom, larger and brighter than the rest.
And bask in its light as it shines down upon me.


This past Sunday morning, a bold, new star dances above us, navigating the heavens, and shining her light upon the earthbound loved ones who look up to the night sky in search of the right answers, not only for their children, but for themselves, as well. 

This past Sunday morning, Lucille, Mother to our son-in-law, Eric, lost her battle with pancreatic cancer. 

Generous of spirit, extremely liberal when bestowing gifts, laughter, and love upon everyone around her, Lucille, wife of Alan, Mother of Adam and Eric, daughters-in-law, Melissa and Alexandria, and Grandmother to four talented, young spirits, Sarah, Amanda, Brenna, and Gavin.....you have left all of us way too soon!

Derived from Latin and French ("Loo-Sill") with an English pronunciation of "Loo-Seel," your name makes me think of a young girl, with thick, golden hair in long plaits resting down her back, running joyfully through a field of sweet grasses and wildflowers! It reminds me of fun and laughter on a Saturday morning watching "I Love Lucy" reruns and repeating the risibility of its contents over and over for her devoted fans to enjoy.

Lucille....not Lou or Lulu, Lucy, Lucie, Cici, or Luce. At least I have never heard you labeled by any of these nicknames throughout our time together. The strength of 'Lucille' always seemed to fit you best! 

The significance of your name was a special and pleasant surprise for me when I discovered that the name, Lucille, means Light: Moonlight, bright light, a state of awareness and understanding, spiritual knowledge and illumination or, 'The Light' in certain doctrine that describes a divine presence in each person. 

Looking up into the night sky tonight, another bright star will illuminate the heavens next to Olga, Beverly, and so many other Moms and caretakers who continue to shine their loving light down upon the children they have left here on earth. In this act alone, we will find peace and comfort and understanding beneath the star beams and majestic twinkles we so often wish upon.


Take refuge in the coziness of the night sky, my Sister!
Nestle in amongst the brave who have flown before you,
For, your time is now and forever!


In Loving Memory of Lucille Miller Siskind.






Copyright © 2016 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved


Tuesday, September 23, 2014

BEYOND THE GRIEVING WELL.....

 A Personal Tribute To A Special Friend...




Dan's Chalk Drawing of Brulee Dated Early 2001




Was it just yesterday morning when time stopped as we have known it for the past fourteen years?  Yes.....

I am suspended within a transparent bubble filled with my own salty tears and supported by the undissolved particles of loss...grief...despair. 

Outside of this bubble the world resembles a Dali dream scape complete with melting clocks and swarming ants where The Persistence of Memory is beating, beating, beating its chorus into my saddened heart.

A well-intentioned gift from Family designed to fill yet another void, this furry, black and white creature bore into my soul upon first sight.  With 'Baby' nails clicking along pink porcelain tiles and sharp, tiny teeth shredding hems of jeans....he opened the 'heart door' and slammed it firmly shut behind him!

Weekend powwow provided his name when our youngest combined my Francophile tendencies with his stark coloring of black and white.  So, Crème Brûlée, he was christened, Bru, for short; Mr. Brûlée, when I seriously required his immediate attention...

Funny how the smallest details rise to the surface: Holding him tight when they drew his blood at the Vet's; watching him interact for the first time with our grandchildren; chasing him around the family room couch until he would stop, turn and chase us within a hail of laughter and heavy breathing on our part...

Brûlée, our Florida Child, shaking in wonder when discovering ice and snow for the very first time. I don't believe he felt comfortable traversing this crystalline landscape.....ever!  Perhaps he just sympathized with his human parents?

He need not worry!  The tiny lizards he loved to hunt and prey on for hours within the heat of an Orlando afternoon, existed for his pleasure....or, so he believed.  Even with their tiny tails eradicated by their furry hunter, these miniature beasts survived to live another day!

I could go on and on and on.... 

For now, we will jump into our 'well of grief' and slide beneath the leaf-laden surface until body and soul can be purged and cleansed by the saturating and healing waters.  After we have allowed our bodies to sink to its very depth, a world of pebbles and silt, only then can we reverse our course and begin to rise to a brighter surface.

As echoes of his paw steps ring in our ears today and memories of his short, wagging tail brighten tomorrow's horizon, we will arise from the well, dry ourselves off in the Floridian sunshine and concentrate on the future.....

That adorable little face and fourteen years of amazing memories with Brûlée by our side will help us smile again, reflect, aid during this grief and, hopefully, guide us full circle into the healing warmth we need so much to find.

Thank you, Mr. Brûlée!  It was a helluva ride!  ❤    


Dated: Monday, September 22, 2014




Best Gift Ever...!  Best Friend, Always...!




Copyright © 2014 By Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved


Thursday, August 28, 2014

WHIRLWIND

 
 
 
 
 

Gavin
Brenna
 

A series of short stories.....


.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes


This past week has been a whirlwind of activity.  Ali, Brenna and Gavin have just left on their flight back to Michigan (which they almost missed due to a police blockade on the Lake Jessup Bridge) and, Dan just called to tell me he nearly met head-on with a deer on the 417 heading into work.  I'm sitting back at home missing everybody.....


Pretty Happy Looking for a 6:30 AM Flight


It's difficult to feel so complete for a random amount of time only to experience such loneliness in a matter of a few minutes.  Ali sent a picture of the three of them all snug in their seats before take-off and I took a selfie of Papa and myself and sent it to them at the same time!! 


Three Pairs of Shoes.....Missing!


Now I sit here sipping my much needed cup of coffee thinking about all of the fun activities we all enjoyed this past week while, in turn,  anticipating our next visit to Michigan in six weeks when our niece, Caitlin, is getting married.  I can wait a mere six weeks to see all of my children......can't I?



Thank You, Jack and Linda.  Dinner was fun!!





There is something quite surreal about sharing intimate space with loved ones all the while knowing that it will abruptly come to an end with a plane ride scheduled just down the road.  You squeeze every last drop of sunshine out of each moment together and savor the memories as though they were sparkling, precious jewels.....which they are.  Golden sequences of opportunity to reflect back on during this time when placing them on that plane tears you apart and the echoes of their laughter and sweet giggles still ring in your ears.





Anticipating the SunRail Train
Gavin enjoyed his first train ride as we traveled on the SunRail line between Lake Mary and Winter Park.  He loves his trains!  Brenna went swimming once, twice and, often, three times a day all week long.  She has been our 'water baby' forever!  Ali met with friends from her 'Old Disney Days' for dinner and a quick catch-up on life's progression since last year.  Papa and I went with the flow, administered a multitude of kisses and hugs and tried not to think about the swift passage of time.



Gavin and Brenna at Winter Park Station




Water Babies at Play......

 


Loved The Bear in Winter Park!!!


Since time waits for no one....we have thoroughly enjoyed what little of it we've had together, creating those golden memories and now having  to move on.  I understand.  I don't always like it but, I understand.  Brenna begins second grade next Tuesday.  Unimaginable!  I recall every detail of my own girls starting second grade and now, we have granddaughters in second and first grades!  Tomorrow a beautiful friend, Eliane Closset, will celebrate her Birthday at her home in Belgium.  Return safely for your next visit to Florida in October, Eliane.  I am 'impatiently' waiting to see you once again et, Bon Anniversaire!  I will be re-entering the world of social media and resuming my regular writing schedule.....which was seriously abbreviated during the past week. 



Choosing A Movie For The Flight Home

I must creatively smooth-back the edges of my life, transform the 'extra special' back into the norm and elude the whirlwind vortex of actions and emotions for a little while.  Keeping life in perspective is such a beautiful and important thing.

Helping Papa Unload The Car




Right now, I must think about remaking the beds, picking-up the pool toys, washing a load of beach towels and consider what to make for a dinner for two....    

Safe travel, My Loves!  Papa and I will see you soon!


Grandma and Papa






Copyright © 2014 By Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved