THANKFULNESS

A series of essays....

EXTREMELY THANKFUL FOR THE BEAUTY OF NATURE;
MOST GRATEFUL TO EVERYONE WHO CHOOSES TO KEEP IT THIS WAY!

....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E Hughes

THANKFULNESS

and gratitude are the two words that we often use to express the benefits we receive in life. Most people do not fully understand the difference between the two, yet each finds its way into our day-to-day life, one way or another; opening the door to joy and happiness as we go about our daily business. We are thankful for the kind gestures bestowed upon us as when someone treats us kindly and with a smile on their face, allows us to go ahead in a long line, or passes the butter to you at dinner after asking them politely to do so. Thankfulness usually happens as a reaction from someone’s action and is, generally, not an occurrence at random moments when the mind is set on ‘idle.’  Offering a polite ‘thank you’ for a simple act of kindness is a gregarious expression of your appreciation and is a social norm applicable in general situations. Thankfulness is often associated with either words or a gesture of appreciation; a ‘tip of an imaginary hat’ act of kindness to be bestowed upon another human being in good faith.

Gratitude is the special manifestation of spirituality, love, and affection. Being grateful is a very intense sense of feeling that happens at a deeper level and comes from within your heart and very depths of your soul. Thankfulness can often be the first step and then we manifest approval and great emotion as we appreciate the people and things that have been of genuine assistance to us in this lifetime. Perhaps it is being grateful for the faithful pair of hiking shoes that have seen you climb a mountain or two, or expressing gratefulness to a spouse who has always been there for you through the ups and downs that life has to offer, or expressing our gratitude towards the sister-in-law who has devoted much of her precious time to her beautiful Mother suffering from dementia for many years. Gratitude is the act of being authentic towards someone by showing love, commitment, and devotion for the meaningful relationship you share. Think of it as if our minds and hearts give birth to the belief that others help us feel good about ourselves, share experiences, and promote the understanding that the universe has conspired to connect us together, then we can feel grateful from within and express our feelings even without the use of words or gestures. It is possible to express how we feel about our own financial blessings and transfer this feeling of gratefulness on by paying for a stranger’s meal. The act of gratefulness can live on in our memory indefinitely, always there to remind us of those we feel grateful toward many years later; suddenly recalling the importance of our loved ones no matter how many years transpire since the last physical reunion.

To be a thankful person is a benefit in life that we should never take for granted. Practicing the art of gratefulness is a step above and beyond thankfulness. Combined, it is the best way to live a fulfilling and enriched lifestyle and the key to happiness is keeping gratitude at the forefront of everything we do. We cannot afford to be thankless or ungrateful for all of the good in our lives, especially now when many lives are feeling the pressure of despair, depression, and hopelessness within a very thankless world. I will always be eternally thankful for the nutritious variety of food that is painstakingly prepared for our Thanksgiving feast either by myself or in conjunction with the people I love. And, I am most grateful for all of those same people who graciously surround me with their kindness and affection, making this particular holiday so special. When we focus on how privileged we are, it makes it easier to want to bless others and express our deep sense of appreciation toward all of the good in the world around us.  

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO EVERYONE! MAY YOU ALWAYS BE THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL FOR ALL OF THE BLESSINGS IN YOUR LIFE...!

Photo taken in September of 2019 at Arcadia Marsh Nature Preserve in Arcadia, Michigan.

Copyright © 2019 by Jacqueline E Hughes

All rights reserved

HEATHER.....AN ANGEL IN DARK TIMES

 A series of essays.....

~MICHAEL CAVNA TELLS US THAT HEATHER'S FAVORITE COLOR WAS VIOLET~
A SIMPLE NOTE THAT OFFERS A PRIVATE LOOK INTO
THE LIFE OF HEATHER HEYER

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes

I've noticed that each time I connect with my Facebook Timeline and scroll down reading everything I can, an interesting thing happens that I have absolutely no control over. You may have experienced this, as well. 

At first, I am concentrating so diligently on each post that I'm oblivious to it. Then the broiling inner emotions make me feel physically ill and I can feel my facial expressions taking on an unusual life of their own. It takes me a while to even begin to understand what's going on. But, when I do, I can feel my face twisting and contorting, my lips begin to pucker and purse, and my eyes crinkle and squint as my forehead wrinkles like the loose skin of a wrinkly Pug puppy. 

~WRINKLY PUG PUPPY~

This, as I understand it, is not acting; this is reacting. I am responding, frame by frame, to the content and extent of the information that has been presented to me and in such a way that my acknowledgement of this information adopts its own style. My emotions are captured, dare I say, possessed, by the most egregious and flagrant violations of human rights and decency that our country has recently experienced. If you don't count the early morning hours of November, 9, 2016, that is.

Heather Heyer.

As if I were watching an M. Night Shyamalan movie, the Indian American film director known for making movies with contemporary supernatural plots and surprise endings, firmly entrenched within my own set of fear and fascination, I become impervious to my surroundings. My attention is focused on the next move on the screen, a black shadow flickering in the upper left-hand corner, the dark, dense feeling in the pit of my stomach, and (once again) my facial expressions as my brain takes in the multiple nuances chronicled in each scene. A pronounced squint becomes my preferred mask-like face for the next hour and a half.

This is, precisely, my reaction to the posts on Facebook from the past several days! If truth be told, within the past year or more.

How does it begin? Will it ever end or, at least, be contained enough to not be as blatantly and brazenly splashed before our eyes like acidic liquid the deep, crimson color of blood? Hatred...unrestrained by a sense of shame; rudely bold, and justified by many while they tout the uniform (white polo shirts and khaki pants) and carry a burning torch in the day or night. 

HER BEAUTIFUL FACE.....!

Hate is a word we teach our children not to use. Hate is an emotion that, if allowed to control us, has the power to turn us inside out as if our internal organs were exposed and we begin to associate the natural beauty and goodness of our world as a 'punch in the gut.' Hatemongers misinterpret the love of family and friends as reprehensible behavior and disassociate themselves from them with the need for a more tangible cause; one that justifies the sense of power bursting forth like molten lava from deep within their darkening souls.

Heather Heyer.

While under the influence of hate, they seek other haters because hate in large quantities helps to substantiate their cause. While strengthening their beliefs and affording themselves more power and more intense reasons to hate, the haters find safety in numbers; justified by the comfort of an administration that clings to them as life supports within a churning sea of dissolution and destruction of the 'law of the land' as we know it.

Even writing about hate right now has gotten to me and I feel my face contorting into 'facial yoga' expressions that I usually reserve for driving alone in the car, protected by the thought that what happens in the car stays in the car. Silly me. Vestiges of 'The Scream' painted by Edvard Munch begin to dissolve before me as I, too, feel a whiff of melancholy while sitting here thinking about his accompanying poem, "I remained behind - Shivering with Anxiety - and feeling the infinite Scream in Nature." Edvard Munch

'THE SCREAM'
"FEELING THE INFINITE SCREAM IN NATURE"

Her beautiful face, from childhood to maturity, a face that projects being deeply loved by her parents, friends, and coworkers alike, flashes before me so often that it's as though I've watched her grow up before my very eyes! Heather Heyer. Post after post after post recalls a very strong, very opinionated young woman who “made known that she was all about equality," according to Alfred Wilson, her boss at the law firm where she worked. Before she was cut down by hate, she was helping people through bankruptcy and telling them, "It's going to be okay."

Heather Heyer could be my own daughter, my friend, the girl next door. For each of her thirty-two years on this earth, I thank her that many times over and over for holding the goodness in life to a higher standard than the sadness of hatred and strife. For this alone, Heather is a hero. Little did she know that she would be making the ultimate sacrifice for all that she believed in and held so dear to her heart by
giving her own life towards the justification of equality and compassion.

As I type her name again, Heather Heyer, not wishing to forget it...ever, I am becoming more conscious of my emotions. The inevitable tears are welling up, rising to the surface, ready to flow. My facial expressions soften, become more relaxed this time, and my breathing is deeper, more sustained. 

Repeating her name, Heather Heyer, out loud is calming. Her kindness, sweetness, and caring for others is like an invisible salve spreading across the earth; angel wings floating above the weak and the wretched, the loving and kind spirited, alike. I don't know what Heather's voice sounds like and, I, more than likely, never will. But, I do know this for certain...when we close our eyes and feel the love, experience the hope, and hear the voice of comfort, we will know it is Heather's and she is telling us not to worry, it's going to be okay!

REMEMBERING YOU....ALWAYS, HEATHER HEYER!
WITH OUR LOVE, AMERICA!!!

Copyright © 2017 by Jacqueline E. Hughes

All rights reserved 

FRIENDSHIP

A series of essays.....

THE ATLANTIC COASTLINE AT CAPE CANAVERAL 

.....as seen through my eyes!



By: Jacqueline E. Hughes


Within our lifetime, may we all be fortunate enough to experience at least one, true friendship. One other living, breathing soul who is willing to walk down the path of life with us on bright sunny days, as well as those dark and sinister ones where flashes of lightening crackle and ravage a darkening sky! If we are lucky, even intermittent friendships will dot our lives with their bright spots of joy. Because who doesn't feel the need to share our experiences, emotions, the highs and the lows, with a listening ear who will greet us with a gentle hug or the clasp of a warm hand when needed?

Dependence is an acquired condition that conjures up the notion of being vulnerable. We feel uncomfortable believing in the absolute certainty of the trustworthiness of another. True friendship can open up our hearts to securing the belief, confidence, faith, reliance, and trust in another human being. Knowing that someone 'has our back' helps to relieve the anxiety of potential emotional injury.

Only a fool would speculate about the life of a woman. Only a fool....or, another woman. Women earn that right and with good reason: we care deeply. Often too deeply and that's exactly what can get us into trouble. Many women are capable of intuitively understanding the residual feelings of others: The lingering aftermath of a bad relationship, the sometimes hurtful words of a close relative, or aiding someone who is lost in a world they believe is filled with hate or fear and needs help finding their way back into the light. These are a few of the attributes of being a friend. Who knows, someday the tables may be turned and you will require the friendship needed to pull you out of the doldrums and calamities associated with....living!

Fortunately, for me, a friendship that sustained two young women back in the days of cheerleading tryouts, acne remedies, prom dates, and acting 'happy-crazy' on a road trip to Boston and up through Canada one summer between our sophomore and junior year of college, has resurfaced after all this time. I couldn't be more happy or more grateful.

Having Janis back in my life is comparable to recently locating my twin sister years after being adopted separately as toddlers. We enjoyed just enough time together only to be scattered in different directions by time, place, and family. All of the chapters contained within our imagined autobiographies...graciously written with love, husbands, and children in mind, would contain pieces of our heart and soul and serve to form the women we have become today.

I will be the first to admit that I am, usually, on the giving end of the spectrum of friendship in that my shoulder has often been used to cry on. And, it has been dampened by tears of sadness, as well as joy throughout the years. A good friend once nicknamed me her "Rock" for the support and kindness given her throughout a very bad relationship.

Being a good friend often requires being a good listener. Listening carefully to someone in need might just be one of the most magnanimous traits anyone could possess in a lifetime.

However, being a 'Rock' certainly has its downside because rocks never get to cry. A rock foundation is one of permanence and strength supporting the heavy load that rests upon it. A person who is similar to or suggestive of a mass of stone in stability, firmness, or dependability. Well, that's quite a lot to live up to.

With age, wisdom tends to seep through the fine cracks of even the most solid foundations....in the form of tears and the realization that sharing the burdens of life with others can be a luxurious comfort and tremendous consolation over time.

I am learning day by day. While my shoulders begin to sag a bit with each passing year, and the 'rock' begins to gradually shift as the sands of 'wear and time' blow mightily across the Florida beaches I hold so dear, the winds of change continue to intensify.

I have always considered myself fortunate in this life......with many good friends and wonderful people I have met and learned from. I will always attempt to 'give back' for all of the positive friendships I've collected throughout the years. Janis, naturally, being a prime example of my "good life." And, I'm raising a pint in honor of all of you amazing souls I have yet to share a portion of my life with in the future. Here's to good things to come.

In most of the spiritual teachings I've gathered and responded to these past several years, remembering that life is about the experience might be the most profound lesson yet. "Life is not a lesson to be learned but an experience to be had, shared, and appreciated with the ones we love. We, too often, like to remind our children that there will be tough lessons to be learned in life, which can in itself, be a defeating attitude. When we can look at life from growth by experience, it lightens the severity of any situation, and allows for a more free flowing transition through each stage of their growth."  .....Spiritual Wisdom by Spirit Science

Jill Blakeway, author, acupuncturist, and spiritual healer once said, "Real friends don't walk away when life gets tough. They make a pot of tea and pull up a chair." Dear friend, may I have a little honey and lemon with my tea, please?


Copyright © 2016 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved

FIFTY SHADES OF BLUE

A series of essays.....

Fireball Sinking Into The Horizon

.....as seen through my eyes!

By: Jacqueline E. Hughes


"Gwandma, Grandma, Gamma......I love you!" floated across the cavernous space of the airport as the sound of small, sneaker-clad feet bounded rhythmically across the cold, cement floor. 

Funny how time has a way of seamlessly slipping away, dispersing its holy 'granules of life' throughout the autumn landscape.

For ten days of my life I mingled with family and long, lost friends in a place that existed long, long ago and far, far away.  My mind recalls teenage dates, walking hand-in-hand in Bronson Park, eating post-movie meals at fast food places along South Westnedge Avenue before heading home to Three Rivers.  Now, my children inhabit this place of my youth and I visit Kalamazoo, Michigan for very different reasons.

Last Glimpse

The precious endearments floating up to my ears at this moment emanate from Brenna and Gavin.  They have accompanied me and their parents to the Gerald R. Ford International Airport in Grand Rapids to see me off on my flight back to Orlando where their Papa will be waiting to drive me home.  It's been an interesting week for me....chock-full of revelations!  But, another time and story for you....a bit later.

"Ma'am, please collect all of your belongings and follow me over to this table, please."  I knew I shouldn't have brought that can of Healthy Valley organic lentil soup back in my carry-on!!  Sure enough, 'the can' was his targeted item.  After shaking it, swabbing it for negative residues, shaking it again and, finally excusing himself to have a petite chat with his supervisor....I was given possession of the soup once more.  Yeah, a lunch for the following week had not been confiscated!

I have often sat at Gate A3 awaiting my Allegiant flight to the Sanford Airport.  And, I am positive there will be many more times for me sitting at this Gate in the future.  We've flown Allegiant, a direct two hour plus flight from Michigan back to Florida, so often that I affectionately call it my 'bus ride' home.  When it is a smooth ride and I have a good book in hand, I can almost blink and the wheels are touching down onto the Sanford tarmac. 



Blue So Bright.....!

Like a small child, I always prefer the scenic luxury of a window seat.  Judging by the clear, blue sky and the promise of beautiful weather, my particular window would be facing an autumn sunset soon to appear across the vast horizon.  I was delighted by this prospect. 

Navigating the corrugated bumps and turns of the jet bridge leading out to our plane, I stopped for just a moment, placed my flattened right hand on the outside of the plane just to the right of the door, silently recited a 'little prayer' to my angels and proceeded to push my meager belongings up into the craft to take my seat. 

"You have your own little ritual when it comes to flying, don't you?" she asked, looking straight into my eyes.  Surrounded by anywhere from four crew members, including the pilot, and boarding passengers ahead of and behind me, I looked-up into her startling green eyes as she stood planted between cockpit and galley.  Looking back over my shoulder at her, the 'moment' resembled a movie scene where the camera pulls back from above the action creating a 'fish bowl' effect and the main character is highlighted by an aura of bright light.

Seldom one to stammer or stumble over my words.....there I was, a bumbling fool attempting a response. 

"You..you..saw me..touch..touch the plane?" 

"Oh, yes," she replied.  "And, I understood immediately what you were doing.  I watch and listen...."

(I kid you not....people, and this all confused me because I began doing this little ritual my very first commercial airline flight as a young teenager! This was the first time ANYONE has ever said anything to me about it!)

"But..but..you are the only one who has ever...ever seen me do it!" I squeaked with my neck still turned at an odd angle looking at her enlightened face. 

Never missing a beat or taking her gaze away from mine she said, "Not necessarily, however, I might be the only one who has ever mentioned it to you before." 

As the camera lens zoomed back in and her aura dissipated, her smile spread wide across her pretty face.  She raised two fingers of her right hand in an apparent 'peace symbol V' formation and then slowly turned her wrist bringing her fingers in line with her own eyes.  With a quick turn of her wrist, she aimed her fingertips in my direction saying, "I am watching and I see everything....that is what I do.  That is my job....!"

As the momentum of my fellow boarding passengers carried me further down the aisle, I looked back one last time to see the flight attendant happily into her 'meet and greet' with those behind me.

Hoisting my little, purple suitcase above Row 15 and taking my seat by the window, I wasn't sure if I'd just experienced a highly spiritual encounter with supernatural forces affecting my spirit...my soul.  Or, if this was the work of a tiny prankster who was either getting into her Halloween mode or practicing for future employment with Southwest Airlines!!  What I did realize was that this petite employee of Allegiant Airlines called me out on a private ceremony I'd been performing for years.  She was not malicious or cruel...rather, honest and forthright about it.  Whatever the explanation, this occurrence really blew me away!

Stowing my purse below the seat in front of me and buckling-up for the flight, my seat mate and I greeted each other, acknowledged one another's reading material with a mutual nod as she kindly inquired if I would like my overhead light turned-on, as well.  Nestling back in a feeble attempt to find comfort in an airline seat, I couldn't help but notice the aged gentleman seated in the center seat in front of us, 14E.  Due to our close proximity and the open angled line of view afforded me, I could see that he was old, cantankerous and, after listening to the conversation with his wife/companion seated directly in front of me....I concluded that he might be suffering with dementia. 

"Where are we now?" he wailed like a young child.  Patting his hand, she responded, "Grand Rapids." 

"What??  When will this thing take-off?  I'm tired of sitting here doing nothing!"

With the patience of a saint, the woman continued to pat his hand until she gave it a gentle squeeze while resting it comfortably on top if his.  He calmed down immediately and settled back, eyes closed.

Picture Courtesy of Greg Spurgeon

Within a few minutes our plane was airborne and we were surrounded by a clear blue sky the shade of peace, serenity, infinity and spirituality itself!  This vision of calmness personified soon took on an ethereal quality, as well when the setting sun, ablaze with shades of gold, bright tangerine and red, pierced the horizon and set the world outside of the small, square window on fire!  As the 'fireball' swiftly sank out of sight, the intensity of color deepened affording all of us fortunate enough to be seated on the right side of the plane a panoramic view of brightening stars along with a crescent-shaped moon dangling within a blanket of deep, deep blue...!  The shade of blue that evokes a deep-seeded feeling of trust, dignity and super intelligence.

The entire world around me was changing, ebbing and flowing like a crystal blue river dancing in the moonlight.  It was enchanting and we sat totally mesmerized by God's ultimate light show in the heavens.  Yes, thirty-three thousand feet above everything else near and dear to me, I had been capturing moments of this spectacle with my smart phone, hoping to be able to relive it all again but knowing that this was an event only the naked eye and an open heart could truly retain.

Certainly my green-eyed flight attendant must have been keeping her attentive watch on all of us in that plane....after all, that was her job!  If so, I never thought much about it and subconsciously relied upon her diligence and work ethics the whole flight.  Looking for her later as we debarked from the plane, she was nowhere to be found.  Curious...

An Ethereal Quality

Isn't that what Love is all about?  It's not that we take it for granted or fail to work hard in order to achieve it but, when we finally feel comfortable with it, green eyes watching closely or a blanket of blue studded with sparkling stars and a crescent moon above....we allow the Love to wash over us with little to no resistance.

My friend in 14E had closed his eyes early on and slept as his loving companion continued to shelter him with the touch of her hand on his.  Was this the Love we all hope for and seek out within our lifetime?  Someone to be there and appreciate us no matter what travails we both face along the way?

Beauty Framed By The Plane's Window

My two hour 'bus ride' could not have been more interesting or enlightening.  There was so much to think about, ponder and question as our plane began its decent towards the miniature, man-made, twinkling lights and our final destination.  I had been surrounded by so much Love displayed in so many ways all day long beginning with my grandchildren's hugs and kisses, to the dedicated flight attendant, God's spectacular light show, and the loving couple in Row 14.  I enjoyed the solace in knowing that soon I would be welcomed, after a seven day separation, back into my husband's loving arms!

Mr. 14E had finally awoken from his temporary 'escape' into the world of dreams.  Slowly turning towards his companion, he gently placed his large hand upon hers for a change and, with a calm smile on his face, he asked, "Are we home now?"

 

 

Courage and Best of Luck to Everyone in November!!!

Copyright © 2014 by Jacqueline E. Hughes
All rights reserved